Director: E. Elias Merhige

Unsurprisingly, Begotten hasn't been shown to any Catholic school's religion classes since its 1990 debut, at least none that we're aware of. Maybe that's because filmmaker E. Eliash Merhige's 74-minute art film opens with a person referred to as God disemboweling himself.

Or perhaps it's due to the following scene, in which Mother Earth rises from God's body and impregnates herself with his semen, before she's later raped by a bunch of wanderers who've already attacked her offspring, the Son of Earth, with what looks like an umbilical cord. You're telling us that some crafty theology professor can't efficiently compare Mother Earth's self-baby-making to the Holy Spirit planting Jesus inside Mary's belly? No wonder folks love to criticize our school systems.