Predicting Who Will Win Every NFL Game for Week 13

Image via Getty

Chopz: Nothing like watching the Lions lose on Thanksgiving. A tradition like any other. 

Adam: If you know anything about Jeff Driskel or whoever the hell is going to be Detroit's quarterback you’re either lying or a pathetically loyal Lions fan who will once again be embarrassed when your team gets trucked on Thanksgiving.

Angel: The Lions losing on Turkey Day is a national tradition. Da Bears.

Zion: Some dude named David Blough is starting for the Lions…. That should tell you enough. Bears win.

Chopz: The Bills are frauds, IDC. Cowboys win this one. 

Adam: Cowboys and it’ll be closer than the experts think. 

Angel: This is going to be the best game on Thanksgiving. I’ll take the Cowboys, unfortunately.

Zion: Garrett will not make it to next week if the Cowboys lose so they’ll pull this one out. 

Chopz: Somehow fell into the Falcons trap last week. Give me the Saints on the road. 

Adam: Give me New Orleans because it feels like Atlanta is due to start a new losing streak. 

Angel: Saints on the road in a blowout.

Zion: Nah, this time I’m really never picking the Falcons again. I don’t care. Saints. 

Chopz: Jets continue their hot streak in Cincy. 

Adam: I would prefer the Jets lose these games for draft purposes, but they’re playing better than I ever expected despite injuries and talent deficiencies. Bengals do not get their first win against Gang Green. 

Angel: The Jets make it four in a fucking row. Still fire Adam “Coke Eyes” Gase, though.

Zion: Wow, the Jets are really on a little streak here beating up on bottom feeders. Jets. 

Chopz: The Eagles are not a great team but the Dolphins really stink, so Philly takes this one. 

Adam: Philly fans would set the Linc on fire if they lost to Miami. For a change, Eagles look competent in the win. 

Angel: Philly in a route.

Zion: There are some bad matchups this week. Philly by 76. 

Chopz: Pretty huge game for the AFC playoff race. I’ll go with the Titans on the road. 

Adam: What Ryan Tannehill is doing is not sustainable. Colts at home. 

Angel: That spread is telling me to take the Titans, but I think the Colts get it done in a must-win game.

Zion: Titans. 

Chopz: Panthers roll. 

Adam: People are making way too big of a deal about Dwayne Haskins missing the final snap to take a selfie with a fan. That take aside, Panthers. 

Angel: Panthers win and they cover.

Zion: CMC runs for 256 yards and 5 TDs. Panthers roll. 

Chopz: Give me the Packers on the road in a bounce back game. 

Adam: The Giants defense is deplorable. Packers should have to walk home if they don’t put up at least 35. 

Angel: Packers are going destroy the Giants on the road.

Zion: CALL THE POLICE. WHAT AARON RODGERS IS ABOUT TO DO TO THE GIANTS SECONDARY WILL NOT BE LEGAL. 

Chopz: You guys already know who I’m taking here. The Browns not only win, but they get back to .500 and increase their chances of making the playoffs. Don’t say I didn’t tell y’all this was going to happen. I just wish Mason Rudolph was playing. He was maybe the Browns best player last time they played. 

Adam: Give me the Steelers because I want chaos. 

Angel: Cleveland is going to be fired up and will use that to beat the breaks off MAGA Rudolph Hodges and the Steelers.

Zion: MAGA Hodges is starting.... But I’m not picking the Browns to be .500 so Steelers pull this out. 

Chopz: Give me the Bucs on the road. 

Adam: Bucs take this one. 

Angel: Tampa makes it two in a row.

Zion: Famous Jameis eats another W. 

Chopz: Man, what a game this will be. I think the Ravens roll at home. 

Adam: 49ers in a major swerve. Lamar has been incredible. But can he really keep this up? 

Angel: My heart is telling to go with the Niners but my head is saying that they won’t continue to go undefeated on the road. B-More continues their hot streak to make it nine in a row.

Zion: Ravens at home, they’re clicking on all cylinders. Possible Super Bowl preview. 

Chopz: Cardinals take this one because the Rams are frauds. 

Adam: The Rams because they have too many dynamic players to lose to the Cardinals. But wouldn’t be surprised at all with an upset. 

Angel: The Rams on the road.

Zion: Cardinals win at home here. 

Chopz: Chiefs roll and do some serious damage to the Raiders playoff hopes. 

Adam: Don’t have the cojones to take the Raiders here, but Pat Mahomes ain’t going to destroy Oakland like he did earlier in the season. 

Angel: The Chiefs win in a close one.

Zion: Chiefs. 

Chopz: Chargers, I guess. 

Adam: Broncos because I’m expecting more back breaking interceptions from Philip Rivers.

Angel: I think the Chargers are the better team? Fuck it.

Zion: Chargers. 

Chopz: Another great game. I’ll take the Texans in a mild upset. 

Adam: Can’t tell you how hard I’m rooting for the Texans. But I think it’s ultimately going to be a Patriots win since Bill Belichick generally does pretty well against his former assistants. 

Angel: New England’s two-game losing streak starts this week.

Zion: Taking the Pats on the road because of what the Ravens defense did to Deshaun recently. 

Chopz: Russell Wilson shows out and keeps the MVP race with Lamar Jackson a bit closer. 

Adam: Minnesota? Nah, Seattle. 

Angel: Seahawks as Russell tries to catch Lamar in the MVP race.

Zion: Seahawks at home.