26. New Orleans Hornets

Record: 2 - 6
Last Week's Rank: 17
Last Week's Results: L @ Utah, 90-94 (Mon); L vs. Philadelphia, 93-101 (Wed); L vs. Denver, 88-96 (Fri); L @ Dallas, 81-96 (Sat)
This Week: @ Denver, Monday (1/9); vs. Oklahoma City, Wednesday (1/11); vs. Minnesota, Friday (1/13); @ Memphis, Saturday (1/14)

After a two-game winning streak to start the season, the Hornets appear to have settled into the role everyone thought they would play when they traded Chris Paul: also-rans. To add injury to insult, Eric Gordon a.k.a. The Only Guy David Stern Deemed Worth Trading Chris Paul For will be out at least another week, if not more, with a bruised knee. Gordon hit the game-winner in New Orleans' season-opening win over Phoenix, but he's only played one game since. At this rate the Hornets would settle for the shell of his former self that Lamar Odom has been for the Mavs. Shit, at this rate, the Hornets would settle for Khloe just fouling motherfuckers. On the bright side, another Paul trade chip, Al-Farouq Aminu, has been tearing it up, notching his first double-double in the loss to the Mavs. On the not-so-bright side, Emeka Okafor put on his best Frederic Weis impression in the same game. —Jack Erwin