The cast started this week's episode by putting together a mock virtual high school graduation. Although the class requested several other celebrities, President Trump—played by Alec Baldwin—was chosen as their commencement speaker. During his speech, Trump tried to turn all of America's horrible realities into optimistic opportunities.
"You're actually lucky to be graduating right now," he said. "There are so many exciting new jobs out there, like grocery store bouncer, cam-girl, porch pirate, amateur nurse, and coal. Don’t forget about coal, it’s in the ground and you just dig down and grab it."
Baldwin's Trump also took the time to praise himself. SNL brought in the president's fascination with Abraham Lincoln by stating that he's being treated worse than Lincoln. His admiration moved Chris Redd and Kenan Thompson's characters to remind him that Lincoln was assassinated.
"Hey, let’s mute him. Let’s mute a lot of the jazz types," Baldwin said, referring to all the black graduates.
The graduates start to push back at Trump, shouting "we want Fauci" in reference to the director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, Dr. Anthony Fauci. Trump responded by wondering if they hate when "elite medical experts" tell them what to do. He then starts to cough, which he quenches by taking a drink of bleach.
After watching him take a sip of his "good ole invincibility juice," students start to leave the virtual meeting. Despite this, Trump still decides to give them some "real advice."
"Believe in yourselves and you can achieve anything, look at me. I started as the son of a simple, wealthy slumlord and grew to become a billionaire, a president, and the world’s leading expert on infectious diseases," Trump said. "Surround yourself with the worst people you can find, that way, you’ll always shine. If you don’t understand something, just call it stupid. Never wear sunscreen, and live every day like it’s your last because we’re going to let this virus run wild."
Watch SNL's entire cold open above.