If Ben Carson's recent assertion that abortions were similar to slavery didn't quite whet your appetite for preposterous tomfoolery, this should certainly do the trick. Pastor Ben Bailey, the head of Gospel of Christ Ministries in Tennessee, told his viewers (dude’s got a TV show!) on Sunday that women who had abortions should be treated like people who killed bald eagles and/or destroyed their eggs. What does this mean exactly? Well, Bailey wants to send these women to prison.

"Let’s think about how inconsistent this is," Bailey said of The Bald and Golden Eagle Protection Act, as shown in the clip above thankfully captured and shared by Raw Story. "For example, bald eagles and their eggs are protected by both state and federal laws. In fact, violators face penalties up to $25,000 or fines and prison — between one and five years." Did he stop there? Of course not:

"In fact, if you break a bald eagle egg, you can get five years in prison, and yet, you can abort a human fetus and get governmental approval? Does that make sense?"

Yes, Bailey. It makes perfect sense. But, by all means, continue:

"A person can be fined $20,000 or get five years in prison for breaking a bald eagle egg, and yet, nothing is done if we abort a fetus!"

Where are you when we need you the most, John Oliver