Image via Complex Original
When you put too much ego and money in one city, you're naturally going to get a good amount of mayhem. This is the case with the NBA's annual spectacle: All-Star Weekend. As the biggest event of its kind in American professional sports, the three-day event has evolved from a showcase of the league's best talents to a media and celebrity extravaganza. Naturally, when something gets as big as the All-Star Weekend has, things start to go a bit awry whether it's on the court or extracurricular activity.
Attending players have stayed out of extreme trouble for the most part during the event that is now going on its third decade. All-Star Weekend doesn't involve just players though. There are thousands of people attending the festivities who don't have as much to lose as the superstars, so scandals and arrests are bound to happen. There's been booming escort business, exotic dancer ethics called into question, and team dancers setting thirst traps. Players brought some of that craziness in a SFW form to the court, too. Ask Penny Hardaway's tearaway pants. Here's A History of All-Star Weekend Shenanigans.
The Michael Jordan Freeze-Out
Date: 2/10/1985
Location: Indianapolis
Legend says it wasn't entirely Michael Jordan's fault that he scored just seven points and six rebounds in his first All-Star game. Isaiah Thomas supposedly conspired with his Eastern Conference teammates to not give him the ball and even told the opponents to attack Jordan. Thomas said this wasn't true years later, but even so, this was the symbolic start of Jordan's struggle against the Pistons in the '80s. Jordan ended up with the last laugh in 1992, however.
Michael Jordan Pantses Penny Hardaway
Date: 2/11/1996
Location: San Antonio, TX
Perhaps the most underrated skill of Michael Jordan is his ability to troll on occasion. That skill understandably took a backseat to his greater, more GOAT-like accomplisments, but Penny Hardaway found out what was up here. Plus, look at Jordan's face looking like he's going to give him a nice toilet swirly after the game.
Michael Jordan and Penny Hardaway Team Up to Pants Dikembe Mutombo
Date: 2/9/1997
Location: Cleveland
Yes, this is a tag team pantsing, but Jordan does own this one in a contextual sense. This is his way of saying, "That ass is mine." A few months later, it was. Ayo!
Shawn Kemp and Gary Payton Don't Respect Kevin Garnett's Come-Up
Date: 2/9/1997
Location: Cleveland
Before he was one of the league's most intimidating forces for one of its most middling teams, Kevin Garnett was just another youngblood (though an extremely talented youngblood) amongst men. Unlucky for him, his elders were Shawn Kemp and Gary Payton, who were known for talking that trash in addition to being one of the top NBA duos of the '90s. Kemp can't dunk on his own teammate, however, so ragging on the dude who would later tell Tim Duncan "Happy Mother's Day, motherfucker" (his mom passed away while he was young) would have to do.
Anthony Mason Allegedly Messes With Someone Half His Age
Date: 2/7/1998
Location: Queens, NY
When you're accused of statutory rape, things like hair designs tend to be trivial details. The former Knicks player was hit with two counts of third-degree sexual assault of a 14 and 15-year-old girl in New York. Although he ended up being sentenced to "just" two counts of endangering the welfare of children and 200 hours of community service, the accusations alone are going to last him a lifetime.
Gilbert Arenas' Trampoline Dunk
Date: 2/18/2007
Location: Las Vegas
No, this wasn't during the Dunk Contest or pre-game. Gilbert Arenas actually came off the bench to perform this during a commercial break. He was a mistake and an injury away from meme infamy and multiple Wizards front office heart attacks on his cconscious.
Alvin Williams and Kobe Bryant Have a Rap Battle
Date: Unknown
Location: Unknown
Grantland's in-depth piece on Kobe Bryant's unsuccessful attempt to start a rap career revealed this tidbit—a footnote—from former guard Alvin Williams:
I was walking out of the Hilton and bumped into him as he and a couple of buddies were getting out of a limousine. I said, 'What are you going to do?' He's like, 'Go to my room and rap until my voice gets hoarse.' I go, 'You can't rap.' It was like straight out of a movie. He says, 'I can't rap?' Then he turned to one of his friends and said, 'Give me a beat.' His friend started beatboxing. Kobe then rapped for about 15 minutes straight. By the time we finished, I swear to God, there are like 150 people circled around. Then everyone expected me to rap. I walked away. I don't rap. They had their whole routine. It was straight out of Krush Groove. He wasn't that bad. And I'm a rap head.
This kind of sounds like the video to Eminem's "Rap God." Imagine Bryant just levitating and rapping his ass off out of nowhere in this sequence.
Charles Barkley and Referee Dick Bavetta Kiss It Out
Date: 2/18/2007
Location: Las Vegas
The out-of-shape Charles Barkley, being the entertainer that he is, decided to race against the older, but in-shape Dick Bavetta during a particularly crazy All-Star Weekend. He also decided to kiss him on the lips for some reason. In 2012, Shaquille O'Neal joked about giving $1,000 to the person who got the moment tattooed on themself. People tend to take such offers literally.
Adam "Pac Man" Jones misinterprets "making it rain," and is subsequently implicated in a shooting incident.
Date: 2/18/2007
Location: Las Vegas
If you had to pick one All-Star game where reason took an L, it would be the one held in Sin City. This particular weekend got so bad that approximately 400 people got arrested in what was a particularly out of control weekend.
NBA players managed to avoid the negative attention as a post-prime Nelly and Adam "Pac Man" Jones snatched those headlines. Although Nelly didn't have a hit in years, he still was worth over $50 million. That's not the case with Jones. The two started throwing some dollars in the Minxx Gentleman's Club by making it rain on the stage. For whatever reason, Jones thought strippers had to ask for permission when collecting the money.
Just picture this shit for a minute:
**Patron throws $20 bill on stage, where it lands next to a cavorting stripper, who then inquires**
Dancer: Hey sir! I'm just curious as to whether or not this is your $20 bill.
Patron: Why yes. Yes it is.
Dancer: Cool. **glances away for coyness before fixating his eyes on the patron** I hate to be a bother, but I was wondering if I could—perhap—use that $20 bill. I'm worried about being short on rent this month and my landlord is a bit of a tight ass. Then I'm gonna have to hear his mouth and it's going to lead to this issue and you know how that headache goes.
Patron: Oh sure, miss.
Dancer: Thank you soooooo, so much.
Patron: Pleasure to make your acquaintance
That doesn't happen.
Anyway, an angered Jones allegedly slams a dancer's head on to a stage, which leads to a brawl involving his entourage and a shooting that left one former wrestler paralyzed. Jones ended up having to pay $15,000 to people involved in the shootings, and various other off-the-field incidents eventually led to a one-year suspension.
From Shaq with Love
Date: 2/18/2007
Location: Las Vegas
Shaquille O'Neal came with a rare mix of showmanship and talents that showed itself when he was under the spotlight. There's some laughs to be had here though...that is, if you consider the Kiss of Death in the The Godfather 2 funny. What if in the back of his mind O'Neal was like, "You broke my heart, McGrady," because he could never stay healthy. McGrady would never play in another All-Star Game after this one.
Sacramento Dancers Leak Thirst Traps
Date: 2/17/2008
Location: New Orleans
Common wisdom says risking you're professional career by saying something along the lines of, "Hey guys! I'm young and flourishing for the moment with my mob. Here's a Drake lyric to show there's hidden emotional depth despite these Jose Cuervo bottles," while captioning Instagram posts. Instagram didn't exist and social media wasn't as ubiquitous as it is now, but the Internet definitely was, so it's understandable why the dancing team came under fire after posting pics of them partying. Kings co-owner Gavin Maloof ominously said, "We'll deal with it internally," in response to the situation.
Shaquille O'Neal Tries to Hang With the Jabbawockeez
Date: 2/15/2009
Location: Phoenix
Shaquille O'Neal was unfortunately many things other than a great player in the latter part of his career. His stint as jack of all trades, master of none includes being an entertainer, humor vehicle, overweight veteran and...Hey look! Here's Shaq playing the goofy, over-sized dancer.
Prostitutes and Dancers Flock to Dallas
Date: 2/14/2010
Location: Dallas
Although NBA publicity would want you to believe otherwise, the All-Star Weekend is definitely a three-day party. There's a lot of sinning to be done with that much money and ego in a concentrated area. There's also a lot of money to be made, including in the sex industry. Reports stated that officials estimated hundreds of sex workers and strippers made their way to Dallas to take advantage of the extra business. You definitely can't knock the hustle. No NBA player got caught up in scandal though.
Kevin Garnett Clowns Craig Sager for His Suit
Date: 2/17/2013
Location: Houston
Kevin Garnett will forever be wrong for not co-signing Craig Sager's attempt to bring back the shiny suits. He messed up a potential watershed moment in fashion history.
What's Wrong With Steve Francis?
Date: 2/16/2013
Location: Houston
Steve Francis is one of the biggest reminders of how easy it is to go from KING to lame in less than a decade. He went from having the greatest honor in the history of everything—a spot on the NBA Livecover—to being a player in the Knicks, which was where careers went to die in the aughts (Stephon Marbury and Tracy McGrady guys?). That doesn't quite explain why he was looking like this last year, however. People speculated drug usage, but there's no definitive explanation for why he looks like the bruised part of a banana.
Melo, Wade, Harden, and Griffin Would Like to Sing You a Song
Date: 2/18/2013
Location: Houston
Carmelo Anthony, Dwyane Wade, and Blake Griffin doing covers for the All-Star Game is cool. It's funny, we get it. But let's be real here. We need that "Harden Soul." Like now.
Lil Wayne Makes NSFW Claims About Chris Bosh's Wife
Date: 2/18/2013
Location: Houston
Chris Bosh did not have a great showing last year between getting nutmegged by Chris Paul and Lil Wayne saying that he hooked up with Mrs. Bosh years ago. It wasn't just the fact that he claimed he had sex with another man's spouse. The way he delivered the claim was something like Full House's Joey Gladstone. "And, and, and! I f*cked Chris Bosh's wife!" Damn.
