Tim Duncan is less than one month into his post-NBA life, but someone is already trying to help him map out his next move. An elaborate LinkedIn profile was recently created for Duncan, which highlights his work experience from his previous job as a "Power Forward at San Antonio Spurs."
Per FOX Sports:
My responsibilities included:
- Scoring in the high and low post against a wide array of competitors.
- Blocking and altering opponents shots.
- Grabbing and securing rebounds on the offensive and defensive end.
- Passing the basketball for both assists and general ball movement purposes.
- Onboarding recently-traded-for co-workers, helping to familiarize them with our sets, system and culture.
- Screening and rolling from all relevant directions.
- Spearheading late game scoring comebacks.
- Mentoring younger co-workers and helping them reach their goals.
- Engaging the locker room in Socratic Dialogue."
With leadership traits like "Spearheading late game scoring comebacks" and teamwork qualities such as "Onboarding recently-traded-for co-workers, helping to familiarize them with our sets, system and culture," how could Duncan not get a response for any job he applies for? Of course, when Timmy does get that phone call, it will probably play out something like this:
It also helps that people were coming through with endorsements to help Duncan bolster his profile and land that next job interview. Our favorite being "Clinical Psychology," obviously.
Screengrab, courtesy of SB Nation:
Unfortunately, the account has since been deleted. So, you won't be able to add him to your LinkedIn network.
Send all complaints, compliments, and tips to email@example.com.