Khloé Kardashian is taking a moment to remember Tristan Thompson’s late mother, Andrea, who died after suffering a heart attack two weeks ago. 

On Monday, Khloé opened up about her grief following the tragic news. Kardashian explained that she tried to avoid acknowledging the deep pain she felt. “I have been avoiding this…. voiding accepting this is real. I have so much to say but nothing at all….I have so many emotions and still I feel numb,” the Good American CEO said in a lengthy caption.

She continued, “Life can be brutally unfair at times and this has been one of the toughest times in so many of our lives. But at the same time, I feel blessed that I am lucky to have had someone that makes saying goodbye so incredibly difficult. So difficult that I’m choosing not to say goodbye for good because that is something I cannot fathom.”

Kardashian, who shares two children with Tristan, added that she’s hopeful that Andrea is at peace. She concluded her message by saying she refuses to say goodbye. “Goodbyes for good are something I don’t believe in. I KNOW I will see you again. I know I will hear your sweet voice and infectious laugh again. I know I’ll get to feel that embrace of yours.”

TMZ broke the news earlier this month that Andrea was immediately rushed to the hospital, where doctors tried to resuscitate her without success. Her funeral took place on Jan. 14, and was attended by Khloé, her sister Kim Kardashian, and momager Kris Jenner.

Like Khloé, Jenner also posted a touching tribute to Andrea, describing the latter as “the most amazing, dedicated, devoted, and selfless mom.”