UPDATED 11/25/16: Christ. Really!?!? Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom have reportedly ended their 10-month marathon of dating and couple-y stuff, at least according to the hardened purveyors of journalism over at In Touch Weekly. According to its sources, there "appears to be some confusion" regarding who dumped who and why said dumping even occurred.

"Not long after Halloween, Orlando confessed to pals that he'd decided to end their relationship," one source claimed Tuesday, noting that he was apparently just thinking about the future. "He claimed that he's just not ready to get married and have babies." A source close to Perry, however, has a slightly different take. "She said they were on different life paths and as much as she likes him, it's time to move on," an alleged Perry "insider" said.

So, um, I guess someone (REPORTEDLY!!!) got dumped either way? 

Perry and Bloom have popped into a number of headlines during their 10-month relationship, most notably shattering Twitter when some sleuthy paparazzi published photos of Bloom's personal pirate:​

That incident ultimately resulted in Seth Rogen, future Oscar winner, comparing Bloom and Justin Bieber's sausages during a televised chat with Andy Cohen. "Orlando's, I was really happy with," Rogen said back in August. "Good for him! He's in great shape overall. I thought, honestly, Orlando's probably a bigger guy and proportionally his penis looked to scale." Revisit that riveting discussion below, now complete with a tinge of post-breakup sadness:

Hollllddddd up. As spotted by E! News Friday, both Perry and Bloom were seen on the 'gram doing some remarkably couple-y Thanksgiving activities amid all this breakup talk:

Fair enough.