10. DON'T Have a Weak Handshake

We understand that many of you haven’t been working on your hand strength for as many years as we have—we've murked a hundred smiley-face stress balls—but fear not, there is hope for you. The handshake with the father is a hallowed and fear-provoking moment for even the most grown-assed of men. The only way to be ready is to be prepared. So, for the week prior to your meeting, shake the hand of everyone you see.

Pro Tip: Join a recreational sports league or political organization, as the end of games and political rallies are statistically the most handshake per capita events on God’s green.