Key Takeaways
- On his Great Divide Tour, Noah Kahan has turned a string of fans allegedly pooping and peeing in their seats into onstage comedy bits, including a fake "call" to Congress in D.C. ordering everyone to wear diapers.
- The running gag started after a viral Reddit account from his Philadelphia show described a fan defecating in their seat and "waffle stomping" it, prompting Kahan to post on X urging people to just use the bathroom and to make crowds pledge not to "shit my pants."
- Most recently, a Threads user said a woman at Kahan’s Citi Field date pulled down her shorts and urinated in her seat, allegedly soaking a stranger's purse and fueling more online disbelief over why his concerts keep turning into makeshift bathrooms.
Noah Kahan turned a viral moment involving his fans not making it to the bathroom in a timely manner into a comedy skit during a recent show.
On Wednesday (July 22), while on stage performing at Nationals Park in Washington, D.C., Kahan joked with fans that he was receiving a call from Congress during his "Dial Drunk" phone booth segment.
The 29-year-old singer-songwriter, pointing to the recurring issue of concert-goers allegedly going to the bathroom on themselves in the middle of his show, claimed an Act of Congress was passed that required his fans wear a diaper for his shows.
"Oh, people have been pissing all over the floor at my shows as well?" he said. "So, you guys are ordering by Act of Congress that everyone has to wear diapers before they get in? Is that what we've come to? Alright, you heard Congress, fucking put some diapers on next time, y’all."
Following his Philadelphia stop on The Great Divide Tour last month, Kahan took to X to urge people to go to the bathroom if they "have to poop" during his show.
The post may have been in response a Reddit post that saw someone share a harrowing account that allegedly went down at one of Kahan's shows.
"Ok so the person who did this was one row in front of me in section AA," the Reddit user wrote. "I guess they didn't want to miss a couple songs to use the bathroom so they just straight up shit themselves (mind you not liquid or anything in case anyone thinks this was an accident) and started picking actual pieces of poop out of their butt and put it on the floor."
They continued: "She started trying to waffle stomp the turds and acted like nothing happened but we flagged down security. One of the most unreal concert experiences l've ever witnessed."
At another show, Kahan even had his fans take a pledge to not poop, in which he appeared to reference details from the Reddit post.
"I solemnly swear I will not shit my pants and if I do, I won’t take it from my pants and put it on the floor," he said.
While the poop matter seemed to be resolved, a new problem arose in the form of urine.
A post on Threads claimed a woman peed in her seat and on her purse during his show at Citi Field in New York City over the weekend.
"Noah Kahan: 10/10. The woman who turned Section 125 into a restroom: 0/10," the post read. "My biohazard urine soaked purse and everything inside it skipped the ride home and went straight into a Citi Field trash can. Spending $1,000 on tickets wasn’t supposed to end with replacing my belongings due a feral creature turning a section into her personal toilet."
