For lack of a better word, the 2016 campaign season has been a relentless carnival of unprecedented proportions. Donald Trump, still the leading Republican "honey-glazed tiger testicle," has amassed approximately 329 (extremely approximate estimate) gaffes that he somehow flipped into lowest-common-denominator campaign platforms. However, fellow
Republican circus ringleader Dr. Ben Carson has reportedly been gaining ground on Trump and Trump's hair, with recent polls placing the two (three?) candidates within a single percent of each other.
Somewhere in the middle of all this is Kanye West, who playfully hinted at a 2020 presidential run of his own during this year's MTV Video Music Awards. Though his expression of presidential desires quickly spawned cosigns from Jaden Smith and Ice Cube, many assumed Kanye was just fucking around. However, Kanye quickly doubled down (then doubled down even harder) on his presidential plans, eventually offering the following response when directly questioned about whether or not he was actually considering a 2020 bid:
"Oh, definitely. And then as soon as I said that, it was like, 'Wait a second, we would really be into that, because actually if you think about it, he’s extremely thoughtful. Every time he’s ever gotten in trouble, he was really jumping in front of a bullet for someone else. He’s probably the most honest celebrity that we have.'"
"When I run for president, I’d prefer not to run against someone. I would be like 'I want to work with you.' As soon as I heard [Ben] Carson speak, I tried for three weeks to get on the phone with him. I was like this is the most brilliant guy. And I think all the people running right now have something that each of the others needs. But the idea of this separation and this gladiator battle takes away from the main focus that the world needs help and the world needs all the people in a position of power or influence to come together."
Carson wasted little time reciprocating Kanye's praise, taking the opportunity during a recent interview on ABC's This Week to express his excitement regarding the furthering of his relationship with Kanye and its potential impact on his own campaign. "I did have an opportunity to talk with him," Carson told ABC. "I was extremely impressed with his business acumen. He knows a lot about business. I talked to him about the possibility of maybe himself and some of the other people in pop culture doing some music that might be uplifting that might young women a sense of their value and young men a sense of responsibility. I think it could be a tremendous thing in our society."
As undeniably baffling as a Carson / West friendship most certainly
seems is, Carson's remarks paint a clear portrait of someone who, much like the Beverly Hills police, probably didn't enjoy much of Kanye's discography beyond Late Registration. As such, it is now highly recommended that all presidential candidates be required to publicly rank Kanye's albums so that voters have an accurate portrait of who exactly is getting their cosign.
Do we really want someone in the White House who "just doesn't get" Yeezus?