Drake's new Meek Mill diss, "Charged Up," sounds like cold soup. We, as clamorous rap fans and shameless instigators, deserve better than thinly veiled Meek jabs, limp-dick TIDAL punchlines, and vague innuendo about, maybe, Nicki Minaj. Say the names, Aubrey!

However, with or without Quentin Miller's assistance, Drake is so far winning this little war with Meek Mill on the strength of his catalog, brand, and Meek's totally lame reason for beefing ("Wah-wah! Where's my album tweet?"). Meek is supposedly premiering a diss record later this evening with Funk Flex—but will it matter? After failing to escalate his brief, post-"Control" rivalry with Kendrick Lamar in 2013, does Meek really stand a chance of knocking off Drake?

Well, if Meek Mill follows our advice, he just might could pull it off. Here are 5 Things Meek Mill's Diss Song Needs to Beat Drake.