Catchin' Bodies: A History of Cristiano Ronaldo's (Alleged) Female Conquests

Image via Complex Original

Before he rocketed into superstardom, Ronaldo was allegedly wifed up with this Portuguese model. See, most athletes are forced to upgrade from their O.G. chick once international fame broadens their options. The fact that Karina is what Ronaldo was starting with says a lot. Something like: "You lucky fuckin' bastard."

When: 2003

While he was playing at Sporting Lisbon, Ronaldo was introduced to this Brazilian model by her brother, teammate Mario Jardel. Quite an assist. One has to wonder, though...was it an easy tap-in?

When: 2006

A new year, a new Portuguese model. Soraia took the acting world by storm (or at least the Portuguese one) with her breakout role as an escort in the 2007 movie Call Girl. Maybe if she acted more like a lady, she'd still be on Cristiano's arm. #noshots #seewhatwedidthere?

When: 2006

Even though he was photographed cavorting around beaches with this Portuguese television presenter, Ronaldo refused to publicly confirm their relationship. Look, we understand that some people don't like to kiss and tell, but c'mon, son. If an Average Joe had a lady who looked like Merche on their arm, best believe they'd be screaming out "GOOOOOAAAAALLLLLLLLL!!!" and blowing a vuvuzela whenever they went out in public.

When: 2007
Smash Probability: 10

Callgirl? Porn star? This sounds right up the alley for a soccer superstar. Storey revealed all the details of their poolside orgy involving four other hookers . Did Ronaldo know of her porn past? Probably not, but one thing you can bet, the girls definitely asked for that check. They charged Ronaldo £2,940 for their services.

When: 2007

You gotta give it to CR7—he definitely went to the Jay-Z school of courtship. While British actress and lingerie model Gemma Atkinson couldn't keep her mouth shut about her "great" relationship with Ronaldo, he dismissed it as "casual" to the press. In fact, Cristiano was so low-key with it that his own mother claimed that Gemma was making the whole thing up. Damn. Lesson to the ladies: If Ma Dukes denies your existence, you are definitely a beatpiece.

When: 2007

While the two athletes never had a relationship (that we know of), Cristiano did make Maria's list of top 10 dream partners...for mixed doubles. We're wondering how she ended up with former NBA scrub Sasha Vujacic for a brief stint.

When: 2007

Call girls and soccer stars go together like hands on balls. Ayo! This busty escort sold a story to a British tabloid about an alleged hooker orgy with Ronaldo, Nani, and Anderson. She was then fired from her agency, but not before making this statement: "I've slept with about 200 clients and I've never been treated with such little respect. They didn't care about our feelings. They didn't even talk. They just moved our bodies into the right positions." How dare they treat her like a prostitute!

When: 2007

Ronaldo dated this Italian-Brazilian Playboy model in 2007, then reportedly reunited with her in 2009. Karina's claim to fame, other than being on Ronaldo's hit list, is a certain body-piercing that we're not at liberty to discuss here. You won't have to dig too deep to find it, though.

When: 2007

By 2007, Ronaldo was a full-fledged global icon, and seemed to be popping up in the papers with a new chick every week. He caused an international furor when he was spotted making out with Bollywood star Bipasha Basu—which would've been OK had she not been in a very public relationship with fellow Bollywood actor John Abraham. Since Biphasha and John were pretty much the Indian equivalent of Angelina and Brad, the alleged Ronaldo smooch didn't sit too well with the Indian media. To which Ronaldo said, "FOH!" We kid. Everyone knows Ronaldo doesn't really check for the Indian media. We think.

When: 2008

Another classic Ronaldo step-over: He was rumored to have hooked up with this Ukranian model while she was still married to 50-year-old millionaire John Haynes. Alyona's hubby allegedly found out about the affair after discovering text messages from Cristiano on her phone, which he said looked like they had been "written by a 7-year-old." You mad, son?

When: 2008

Ronaldo allegedly hooked up with this Iranian-American model after meeting her at a club. In an online interview, Niki claimed that Ronaldo also skillfully eluded a Paris Hilton shirt-grab earlier that very night. Ghazian stated that "he literally turned his back on her" and that Ronaldo "found Paris gross." But not that gross, as it turns out...more on that later.

When: 2008

Ronaldo began dating the Spanish model after meeting her at a club. Unlike his intensely private relationships with most of his other breezies, Cristiano engaged in open PDA with Gallardo on multiple occasions. You have to wonder why, as he's definitely had badder chicks. Is he on that ol' "show out in an Altima while hiding the Bentley in the garage" steez? Or was the P that poppin'? Propbably the latter.

When: 2008

Never one to settle, Cristiano allegedly hooked up with Italian model Letizia Filippi while he was still with Nereida Gallardo, who was reportedly "furious" about the whole affair. Seems like there's never enough balls to go around. Ayo!

When: 2008

Consider this Portuguese/L.A. socialite to be the poor man's version of Kim Kardashian. Mia was rumored to have briefly dated Ronaldo, a claim that she later denied. Being that a dalliance with Cristiano would only benefit her pursuit of "it girl" fame, we actually kind of believe her. Anyway, why would Ronaldo settle for the bootleg when he could get the authentic version? Once again, more on that later.

When: 2009

This 28-year-old fitness instructor and FHM covergirl claimed to have had a six-week affair with Ronaldo. According to Endringer, Cristiano "lets himself be dominated in bed." The two split once pics of them together surfaced.

When: 2009

Rumors are just rumors, but back in 2009, Goodwin was said to have had a one night stand with Ronaldo. Was this just a quickie relationship? With Ronaldo you never know, but it's safe to say he has the international game on smash.

When: 2009

Back in 2009, Ronaldo was seen canoodling with his rival Juliano Belletti's little sister. The two were spotted in Rome hugging and kissing each other accompanied by uncontrollable laughter. Talk about playing with your rival's emotions.

When: 2009

Back in '09, the socialite quickly rebounded from her break-up with Doug Reinhardt by hooking up with Cristiano at a Hollywood club. We're reluctant to give Ronaldo much credit for this score, being that the defense was pretty much non-existent.

When: 2010

A Portuguese tabloid recently linked Ronaldo with Imogen, the former Miss Wales 2003 and star of Big Brother. While she definitely seems like a two-riffic catch, we noticed something a little interesting about her past hookups. Let's just say that a Catchin' Bodies for Thomas would look like a football starting 11.

When: 2010

Cristiano may have pulled off the rare Paris-Kim double: During one of the "off-again" moments in Kimmy's relationship with Reggie Bush, she vacationed in Madrid, where she and Cristiano were spotted lunching together and carousing in a nightclub, but all G.O.O.D. things come to an end. Kim has moved on and is living the life with Kanye and a bun in the oven.

When: 2010

Jasmine Lennard spilled ALL the beans about her relationship with Ronaldo from how they first met to how their relationship ended. Lennard talk about his need for attention, his "johnson," and his "quick exit." He's also afraid of dogs. She definitely had to be on CTC status before this info became public information.

When: 2010

Ronaldo has his heart tied up by this SI Swimsuit model. Homie turned in his player card to engage Shayk back in 2011, and while he has yet to officially marry, there have been no slip-ups. Can you blame him?