Who Is "The Greatest" in (Almost) Every Sport?

When it comes to professional boxing, Muhammad Ali—who turns 73 on Saturday—was, is, and probably always will be "The Greatest." Throughout his career, he told us just how great he was—he once remarked, "My only fault is that I don't realize how great I really am"—and then he climbed between the ropes and proved it. Over and over and over again. That constant reinforcement is why so many people still consider him the "G.O.A.T." today, even though he hasn't boxed in decades.

But which athletes could be considered "The Greatest" in all of the other sports out there? We're not talking about basketball, baseball, soccer, or football, either. We're talking about sports like haggis hurling (huh?), Tug-O-War (what?), and the always-exciting kite flying (!). It may seem silly, but the way we see it, if there's a "G.O.A.T." in boxing, then there must be one in all of those sports, too, right? Right. So join us as we try to answer the question, Who Is "The Greatest" in (Almost) Every Sport?

Greatness comes in many different forms.

Accolades: Won the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest six times, earned over $75,000 in his career, holds records for bratwurst, cow brains,and rice balls

Takeru Kobayashi stormed onto the competitive eating scene at the 2001 Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest on Coney Island, where he obliterated the previous record of 25 hot dogs by consuming an astonishing 50 in 12 minutes. Indeed, he earns GOAT status in part because he thrust competitive eating (and its parent organization, the IFOCE) into the limelight with his incredible performances. Tipping the scales at just 128 pounds, the Japan native has forever changed the way we look at the sport of eating.

Accolades: Holds at least five Guiness World Records in egg-related events

Ashrita Furman might be the most meta record holder of all-time. Not only has he set 551 different world records over the course of his life, but he indeed holds the record for the most records. Wheels within wheels! A 60-year-old health food store manager living in Brooklyn, Furman doesn’t care that the egg and spoon race is traditionally held for small children; he went ahead and set a bunch of world records anyway, running the fastest 100 meter race in history holding the spoon both in his hand and in his mouth. He also owns records in the mile egg and spoon run, bringing his prolific total of records to five.

Accolades: Has won three Hooverball National Championships

Hooverball was created the early 1930s for a simple reason: to keep President Herbert Hoover fit. The game is pretty simple: on a volleyball court, toss a six pound medicine ball back and forth until it hits the ground. The game is scored like tennis, and while it isn’t especially popular The Hoover Presidential Library Association and the city of West Branch, Iowa host the national championship every year. It’s there that Chris Juels has cemented his reputation as king of the court, playing on teams that have won three national titles.

Accolades: Holds two world records for consecutive kicks, each over 60,000

How amazing a hacky sacker was Ted Martin? On one fine June day in 1997, the Des Plaines, Illinois native stepped up at the Midwest Regional Footbag Championships, started kicking, and didn’t stop for nearly nine hours as he pulled off a world record 63,326 consecutive kicks to cement his place in the Guinness Book of World Records. Of course, going into that outing he already held the record in the Open Doubles One Pass Footbag Consecutive category as well, having set that mark in 1993 along with the Distance Passing record in 1995.

Accolades: Holds world record for longest-ever throw

Scottish sports can be a little weird. Haggis hurling is exactly what it sounds like: you take a block of haggis (a Scottish pudding comprised of sheep’s heart, liver, and lungs, some spices, all encased in the aforementioned sheep’s stomach. Delicious!), stand on top of a whiskey barrel, and fling it as far as you can. Nobody has ever chucked this treat better than Lorne Coltart, who in 2011 smashed the world record by flinging his haggis 217 feet, nearly 40 feet more than the previous record.

Accolades: Won 1462 races and became the highest-paid athlete in history for his generation

Chariot racing is probably the oldest sport on this list, so it’s fitting that an ancient Roman would have been the most proficient at it. Gaius Appuleius Diocles was born in Spain in 104 AD, and made his name as a racer from age 18 to 42. While most used to die very young in this absurdly dangerous profession, Diocles was a pro; he won 1462 of the 4257 races he competed in and amassed a fortune whose modern-day equivalent is about $15 billion. Indeed, he will probably go down as the highest-paid athlete in the history of the human race.

Accolades: Has won over 100 championships using a mix of right and left hand

Perhaps the ultimate validation for arm wrestling legend John Brzenk was his cameo in the legendary Sylvester Stallone movie “Over the Top,” but honestly he didn’t need all that. There is not a trophy in the sport that Brzenk hasn’t won, and he has proven adept at using both his right and his left in competition. While he only pulls in about $15,000 a year from his exploits on the table, Brzenk has never been about the money. It’s about the thrill of competing and the rush that comes with a dominating victory.

Accolades: Won seven world championships

Judy Scheer-Hoeschler is so much more than a seven-time world champion logroller (although that’s nothing to thumb your nose at). She’s also an innovator who has changed the way the entire sport is played. The chipping of wood had long been a problem, but in 1981 Scheer-Hoeschler had the simple-but-brilliant idea to wrap the logs in carpet to provide a grippier surface. What ensued was a watershed moment for the sport that made it accessible to people of all ages, and while the purists grumbled a bit there was no stopping the Scheer-Hoeschler Revolution.

Accolades: Each won two gold medals and a silver at the Olympics

From 1900 to 1920, the Tug-O-War was a staple of the Olympic Games. Few dominated quite like Great Britain, who medaled five times and was the only nation to win multiple golds. Frederick Humphreys, Edwin Mills, and John James Shepherd were all a part of the two gold medal-winning squads as well as one of the silvers, placing them in a virtual dead heat for the GOAT distinction.

Accolades: Has won 11 world championships and 10 national championships to date

While ice hockey has traditionally been dominated by the Canadians, it’s been all-USA when it comes to air hockey. In this century, no American has distinguished himself on the table more than Houston native Danny Hynes. A juggernaut whether playing Stateside or abroad, Hynes has captured 10 world championships and 11 U.S. titles since 2001. And if you don’t think he’s next-level good, just check the tape.

Accolades: Won first-ever career Grand Slam, inducted into ITTF Hall of Fame

Table Tennis, Ping Pong…whatever you want to call it, Jan-Ove Waldner is the king. He has two incredible nicknames: “The Mozart of Table Tennis” in Sweden, and “Evergreen Tree” in China. He has appeared in five Olympic games and in 1992 became the first man ever to capture the career grand slam of titles in the World Championship and World Cup, along with winning an Olympic singles gold medal.

Accolades: Won four world championships, seven national championships, named a National All-Star nine times

They love their hockey in Canada, but let’s not forget ringette, the other skate-and-sticks sport. Essentially, the only difference between the two is that instead of a puck you are pushing around a big rubber ring, and instead of a normal hockey stick you get one without a blade. In this sport played largely by women, no person has had a better run that Canada’s Lisa Brown. A center who started for the Canada national team for over a decade, Brown captained the squad and captured three World Championships and became the first non-Fin ever to be given an award in international achievement from the Finnish Ringette Association. (Ringette is huge in Finald, by the way).

Accolades: Has won three world championships to date

No, not the Cubs’ Mark Pryor. Four Square Mark Pryor is arguably even more impressive, having run off three straight national championships after bursting onto the scene in 2012. While some would say that four square is merely a silly playground game that lacks even a national organization, one look at Pryor’s face will let you know that this sport is all business.

Accolades: Has won 19 world championships to date, constantly pitches at over 90 percent

Plenty of people have tried their hand at tossing horseshoes, only to find that it is actually way harder than it looks. You know who it isn’t hard for? Alan Francis. This guy is straight up ridiculous, having won the world horseshoe championship 19 times (1989, 1993, 1995-1999, 2001, 2003-2010, and 2012-2014) and regularly posting a “pitching rate” (i.e., hitting the pole) of over 90 percent. The New York Times even called him “the most dominant athlete in any sport in the country,” which given his record may actually be true.

Accolades: Won multiple world championships/runner-ups

Tennikoit is kind of a tough game to explain; indeed, it’s probably better if you just watch a little and try to figure it out on your own. But know this: German-born Timo Hufnagel is as good as it gets when it comes to a sport colloquially known as “ring tennis.” He has captured or finished runner-up in pretty much every world championship this century, a decade-long run of dominance rarely seen in a sport that privileges young, athletically gifted players.

Accolades: Broke more than a dozen speedcubing records, including several Rubik's Cube records in 2008

At this point, there are new speedcubing records set every single year. Speedcubers have found new and innovative ways to improve their times—they even use lubricants to help them solve cubes quicker—so it's hard to pinpoint who is actually the best. But we'll go with the Dutch-born Akkersdijk here. Outside of having a name that makes him sounds like a guy that'd be good at solving complex puzzles quickly (spelling out his last name is as difficult as solving a Rubik's Cube), he has set more than a dozen speedcubing records over the years and can seemingly solve any cube-related puzzle quickly and efficiently. Go watch him on YouTube and prepare to be amazed.

Accolades: Ran a 100-yard three-legged race in 11.0 seconds in 1909

Unlike your average three-legged race participants—who take part in the sport during company picnics and family reunions—Hillman and Robertson were world-class athletes who participated in the 1904 Summer Olympics. But that doesn't make what they accomplished any less impressive. In 1909, they completed a 100-yard three-legged race in just 11.0 seconds. That would be fast for a two-legged race, let alone a race involving two men who are joined together. And it's a mark that's probably never going to be touched because, really, who's even going to bother to try?

Accolades: Won hundreds of weekend and regional tournaments—including five four-wall singles championships, three three-wall doubles championships, and one three-wall singles championship during the 1960s and 1970s—and was inducted into the U.S. Handball Association Hall of Fame in 1983

There are quite a few handball players who could be considered “The Greatest.” For example, Oscar Obert has 42 open national and world titles, more than anyone else in handball history. Paul Brady and Luis Moreno have a rivalry that's drawn comparisons to the Roger Federer/Rafael Nadal tennis rivalry. And David Chapman owned four-wall handball between 1993 and 2004. But we selected Haber here because he once appeared on the cover of The Wall Street Journal thanks to his handball prowess and because his Wikipedia entry includes this amazing fact about him: “Haber would clobber the straight-arrow handball players and then wind up in jail or a hospital after days of being on a bender with various females…He lived a lifestyle that would have ruined most professional athletes.” What's not great about that?!

Accolades: Designed one of the largest flyable kites of all time in 2011

Kite flying doesn't sound like it'd be the most exciting sport. But what if we told you that the Al Farsi family—who live in Kuwait and consider themselves “kite ambassadors”—created a kite that was so big that it could cover an entire football field? Well, that's what they did back in 2011 when they had the kite, which looks like a manta ray, built by a kite designer in New Zealand. They've had some trouble getting the thing in the air (it's not as simple as just unwinding the string and letting it fly), but by dreaming big, the Al Farsis proved that no one is as into kites as they are.

Accolades: Broke speed (245 mph) and distance (6,761 miles) records by flying a balloon from Japan to Canada in 1991

Imagine sitting in a hot-air balloon that's traveling at a speed of 245 mph. Sounds…terrifying, right? That's what Lindstrand and Richard Branson did back in January 1991, though, when they flew a hot-air balloon called the Virgin Pacific Flyer from Japan to Canada and used transoceanic jetstreams to do it. It's just one of the many ridiculously crazy hot-air balloon flights that Lindstrand, a Swedish aeronautical engineer, has taken over the years, and it doesn't sound like he's going to stop anytime soon. His ultimate dream is to make a flight around the world in a hot-air balloon.

Accolades: Set speed records for stacking cups in several different events

Believe it or not, stacking cups is an officially sanctioned sport and has been for almost 20 years now. The sport first came to light back in 1990 when it was introduced on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. And since then, it has blossomed into a sport that features people from all over the country participating in tournaments. Orrell holds just about every major record in the sport, though, and has set the bar high by stacking cups very, very quickly in all of the major cup stacking categories using both nine and 12 cups.

Accolades: Won gold medals at the 2008 and 2012 Summer Olympic Games, the 2006, 2007, 2009, 2011, and 2013 World Championships, and the 2005 and 2006 World Cups

Even though he's only 31, Dan has accomplished pretty much everything there is to accomplish in the sport of badminton. The Chinese-born player has won two Olympic gold medals and five World Championships, and has completed the “Super Grand Slam” by winning all nine major badminton titles. No wonder he goes by the name “Super Dan.”

Accolades: Won the Argentine Polo Open Championship, polo's most prestigious international event, 11 times

When most athletes are inducted into their sport's Hall of Fame, it means that they had a great career and that that career is now over. But that's not the case with Cambiaso, a polo player from Argentina who was inducted into his sport's Hall of Fame more than 20 years ago. He's a legend in the sport, but he's also still active and, more importantly, still the No. 1-ranked polo player in the entire world. And he's not planning on slowing up anytime soon.

“I've already made history,” he told Argentine newspaper La Nacion last month, “but I always want more glory. Always.”

Last year, at the age of 39, he took part in 52 matches and only lost two of them. Even if you don't know a single thing about polo, you can probably figure out that that's pretty impressive.

Accolades: Helped the San Diego Dynasty become one of the most prominent paintball teams in the world and turned paintball into a career by winning a number of events

There seems to be a lot of debate over who the best paintballer of all time is. And while Oliver's name doesn't land at the top of everyone's list, we're going to give him the nod here for two reasons: One, he's been playing paintball at a professional level—and winning tons of competitions—for years now. He turned pro in the mid-2000s and was quickly named the “International Paintball Player of the Year.” And two, it sounds like he has made quite a bit of money running around shooting paintballs at people. So while most paintballers take part in the sport as a hobby—an expensive hobby—Lang makes six figures every year to play it.

Accolades: Won four Briers (men's curling championships in Canada), a gold medal at the 2010 Winter Olympics, and a world title

Curling gets clowned by many people during the Winter Olympics. But the truth is that it's not an easy sport to take part in. Martin—who also goes by the name “K-Mart”—has made it look easy over the course of his career, though, by winning every major curling competition at least once. He has also helped his teams win more than $2 million during his career (curling doesn't look so ridiculous now, does it?) and furthered the sport both inside and outside of Canada by promoting it tirelessly. He retired from curling last year but has promised to stay active in the curling community in some capacity.

Accolades: Set a Skee Ball record by hitting five “hundos” (100-point shots) in a row at the Brewskee-Ball National Championship in Brooklyn, N.Y. in 2011

In recent years, there have been lots of Skee Ball tournaments and competitions that have popped up all over the country, which makes it difficult to select one Skee Ball player over all the rest. But we're going to give the nod to Labahn, because he currently holds the record for hitting the most consecutive “hundos” in a row. Hundos are a Skee Ball player's dream and what all good Skee Ball players aim for (they also result in you getting a ton of tickets at the arcade!). So while Labahn's current record isn't unbeatable, he's the only player who has been able to do it during an official competition thus far. Anyone care to challenge him?

Accolades: Set more than 30 Guinness World Records for knife throwing, which is more records than any other knife thrower has set in knife throwing history

Adamovich—who goes by the nickname “The Great Throwdini”—didn't start throwing knives until he turned 50. But ever since then, he's been setting all kinds of ridiculous records. For example, he holds the record for the most knives thrown at a human target in one minute with 102 throws. Oh, and he also hasn't killed anyone while throwing knives, which is always a plus.

Accolades: Won back-to-back World Series of Beer Pong tournaments in 2009 and 2010

Raise your hand if you think you're the best beer pong player in the world. watches as every college kid in the country raises both hands Well, we're sorry to burst your bubble, but you're not the best. Not even close. And that's because you haven't won two—yes, two—World Series of Beer Pong titles. There has only been one tag team that's been able to do it, and that tag team is the Long Island, N.Y.-based Smashing Time, which won the tournament in 2009 and 2010 before finishing in second place in 2013. So while you think you might be better than them, you don't have the accolades—or the $50,000 grand prizes—to prove it.

Accolades: Won the 1980 WFDF World Distance competition and the 1983 U.S. Open Disc Golf championship while simultaneously helping change the way golf disc was played by creating new equipment for it

There have been other disc golfers who have accomplished more than Dunipace. But without him, disc golf probably wouldn't even exist today. In addition to being a disc golf world distance champion, Dunipace also founded Innova Discs in 1983 and created modern golf discs, which are still used in the game of disc golf. It allowed the sport to take on a new life in the early 1980s and earned Dunipace an induction into The Disc Golf Hall of Fame in 1993.

Accolades: Won more than 1,000 thumb wrestling matches during his career, including the 2013 Thumb Wrestling Championship

Every year, thumb wrestlers who go by names like Thumderbird, Thumberlina, and The Thumbertaker (we didn't realize there were so many “thumb” puns) descend upon the town of Lowestoft in England to sort out who the best thumb wrestler in the world is. And while Tigermonkey was unable to participate last year—it isn't cheap to travel to England for an event that doesn't dish out big prize money—he won the event in 2013. He also claims that he's taken part in more than 1,000 thumb wrestling matches during his life…without losing a single one. And once upon a time, he even (accidentally!) caused an opponent to suffer a painful knee injury during a thumb wrestling match. That seems like it takes talent, which is something Tigermonkey clearly has.

“I truly believe there's one thing everyone has inside them that they can do better than anybody else,” he said in 2013. “Some people swim, others are good at singing, others are track stars. I thumb wrestle. That's my thing.”