I received a phone call two weeks ago. It was Mercedes-Benz letting me know that I was not going to be able to drive the CLS63 AMG that weekend. You'd expect that I would start ripping posters off my walls, kicking my pile of sneakers under my desk and throwing my wireless keyboard at the picture of Big Sean we have up in our cubicle for some reason. Instead of a tantrum of disappointment, though, I found myself letting go of a giant sigh of relief. It had to be the only time in my life that I didn't want a 518hp bi-turbo luxury sedan. Why? Because I was supposed to be driving up to Connecticut in this:

A historic nor'easter named Nemo that, at one point, was estimated to dump 42 inches of snow in some spots was headed straight toward New York. No longer was I interested in rolling up in a $100,000 car. My gears had shifted to showing up in a car that would be able to save the day by handling snow without hesitation. And with that thought, Subaru popped into my head. 

Despite the concerned "DO NOT GO, YOU WILL GET STUCK OR STRANDED" texts from my worrisome parents, I cruised right up into New York's neighboring state, just as the first few inches were accumulating. I parked in the open lot, sat in the house, and waited to see how much would actually fall. Growing up in the weather bubble that is northwest Indiana, I was skeptical of these bold guesstimates. I have grown accustomed to hopes of two feet of fresh powder melting under the figurative heat rays that come in the form of false predictions and disappointing snow turnouts. So, how much actually came down? This much: 

The official number I heard was 30 inches, which was enough to force West Harford to bust out this behemoth: 

This was pouring snow into dump trucks which would then take the mounds of white fluff out of the city. Naturally, it brought on the reaction of, "oooooooooohhhhhh, so that's how they get rid of the snow. So, how did the 2014 Subaru Forester handle 30 inches of frozen precipitation? Allow me to explain: