Damn, these Adidas x Barbour boots look like some special forces ninja shit don't they? AND THAT'S 'CAUSE THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT THEY ARE. Well, I doubt if special forces dudes wear such heavily branded equipment, but I'm not a special forces dude, so who am I to say. Although, in high school, our lacrosse coach was in the Navy and had to drop out of the Seal program because he broke his leg in, like, three places jumping out of a helicopter. Yeah, that season of lacrosse fucking sucked. He was super strict and really physically demanding. For pre-season he was like, "You all go to a nerd school, right? Load your backpacks up with EVERY SINGLE one of your nerd books and hit the stairwell." That dude made us run up and down three stories for, like, 3 hours. He also made me carry another player piggyback style because this one time I cheated by shoving my winter coat into my backpack to make it look like it was full of really heavy books. I remember he also had a smoking hot girlfriend who would sometimes come to our games and we'd all be like, "Coach, WOW." And he'd be like, "TEN LAPS FOR OBJECTIFYING WOMEN, YOU FUCKING CRETINS."