Ashley Madison is back on the infidelity-enabling market, meaning the time is nigh for cheaters to prosper once more. At least, that would be the case were it not for the pesky and hella unprecedented ubiquity of Pokémon Go. The augmented reality instaclassic, which requires players to actually leave their homes to capture various Pokémon, can now lay claims to at least one spoiled cheating attempt.
Evan Scribner, who revealed his supreme Pokémon Go fuck-up to the New York Post Tuesday, said he's now a newly single dude. "She saw that I had caught a Pokémon while at my ex's house," Scribner told the Post. "She found out last night at my house and hasn't contacted me since then."
According to the Post, dude was "canoodling with an ex-flame in Bushwick" when he managed to cop a "bat character," which presumably means a Zubat? I don't know. I'm more of a Trouser Goblins fan myself.
Despite this guy's spectacularly bad luck, there is indeed a silver lining worth mentioning: Plenty of extra time to catch Pokémon and ponder the fact that we're all slowly descending into an endless state of nothingness. Fun!
Pokémon Go has proven a more traditional success story for Nintendo, publishers of all Pokémon video game titles. The augmented reality blockbuster has already added billions of dollars to the company's market value, as the Wall Street Journal reported Monday. Furthermore, the game is already a bigger deal than Tinder (at least on Android). But no one's ever been busted for cheating on Tinder before, right?