Perennial joke candidate Vermin Supreme has made a lot of crazy promises, but his pledge to give a pony to every American is probably the craziest because of how thoroughly he’s thought it through as a civic plan. At New Hampshire’s Lesser-Known Democratic Candidates Forum last December, Supreme explained that he supported moving the United States to a pony-based economy and using ponies as a form of national identification, which would mean you’d have to have yours with you at all times.

Strangely, coming after three minutes of deadpan delivery about his mandatory tooth-brushing program, which involves lab-created flying monkeys, the pony promise doesn’t even seem all that weird.