6. Shark-O-Matic

Saints Row The Third

Despite being one of the most recent entries on the list, the Shark-O-Matic is also one of the most deserving. How to explain—okay, remember Street Sharks? They were a quartet of totally badass sharks that lived on the streets instead of the ocean.

Although we never actually watched that piece of shit show, this is what we imagine it was like: when you shoot someone full of chum with the Shark-O-Matic, a (you guessed it) giant shark will erupt from the pavement under their feet and noisily devour them. If every game had a pre-order bonus this unquestionably awesome, those poor Gamestop employees would probably have a lot more luck.