On Thursday, Cardi B told a federal jury that she felt “extremely suicidal” following allegations she had herpes leveled against her by YouTuber Tasha K.

Billboard reports that Cardi took to the witness stand on the fourth day of her suit against Tasha, real name Latasha Kebe, with an emotional testimony. The “WAP” rapper first filed the libel lawsuit against Kebe in 2019, accusing her of spreading misinformation and unsubstantiated claims about her. Among the things she said about Cardi included claims she had herpes, and that she had “fucked herself with beer bottles on fucking stripper stages.” Some of the posts and videos she made about Cardi referred to her as “Herpes B.” 

“I felt extremely suicidal,” said the rapper in court. She also said she felt “helpless” as Kebe shared more allegedly defamatory claims. “Only an evil person could do that shit,” she continued, later apologizing to the judge for her language. According to TMZ, she said the allegations made her feel “defeated and depressed, and I didn’t want to sleep with my husband.” At one point, she said the rumors made her feel as though she didn’t “deserve my kid.” Cardi added that she went to therapy due to the toll the videos took on her.

During her testimony, Cardi denied that she had any sexual transmitted diseases, but said she read comments referencing the allegations after she posted a picture of her kissing Kulture. The trial is still going, and will adjourn Tuesday, Jan. 18.

Other claims that Kebe made regarding Cardi B include a particularly disturbing video in which she said Cardi’s then unborn child, Kulture, would be born with disabilities. She also accused Cardi of being a prostitute, and committing “infidelity.” Kebe filed a $3 million countersuit in response to Cardi’s lawsuit, but her case was dismissed last year after a judge said there was “no evidence” the rapper told her fans to harass her.