SZA’s anxiety is well-documented at this point.
In fact, it almost informed her recent song with Drake, “Slime You Out.” In a new conversation with the Wall Street Journal, the SOS singer revealed that she has a certain way of thinking when working with collaborators.
“If you accept my first draft, I won’t trust you,” she told the outlet. “I just handed in the first draft to Drake, and he’s putting it on his album.”
She went on to explain that because Drake was so happy with her first take, she wondered if he had any ulterior motives.
“I’m scared because I handed in second vocals and he didn’t use that," SZA added. "And now I’m like, ‘Are you trying to sabotage me?’ I know that’s not true. I literally know that’s not true, but that’s how bad I feel about my first draft. When things come from an effortless space, I almost can’t enjoy it.”
While Solána doesn’t necessarily think Drizzy was trying to sabotage her, the experience reveals how she doubts herself and her ability to be successful on her first try. Not surprisingly, “Slime You Out” later debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100.
SZA shared that she’s often in disbelief when the songs she creates with ease are more loved than others she invests time in. That’s what happened with the SOS album cut “Kill Bill.”
The song is the ultimate post-breakup fantasy where she exacts her revenge on her ex. When SZA jokingly mentioned the lyric to her producer, “I might kill my ex!”, the producer told her to lean into the idea. Thus, came “Kill Bill.” But SZA was resentful of the track’s success, just because of its simplicity.
“The songs that I care so much about, that I tried so hard on, people be like, ‘That’s nice,’” she said. “But the shit that took no thought and came out of my mouth in five seconds? ‘Girl, that’s the one.’”
