An invitation to your best friend's wedding just hit your mailbox. Your first reaction is probably excitement. But immediately after that hits you might just think: "Damn, what am I going to wear?"
If this is your very first invite, that short sentence about dress codes can look daunting. You might be thinking, “Can I just wear my Air Force 1s with a buttoned-up shirt?” or “Can I just squeeze into that suit I wore for my high school prom?” You might even see that the dress code calls for casual so you start plotting the greatest streetwear fit pic ever taken at a vineyard.
But slow your roll and don’t go into a wedding without actually doing some research on how to properly dress without looking foolish. While weddings may seem like a chill event that’s essentially just celebrating your best friend or family member tying the knot, you don't want to just assume how you should dress for occasions like these. Entire families will be in attendance along with other individuals held in high esteem by the couple. How you represent yourself as one of their loved ones will reflect on them as well.
If you’re a devoted hoodie and sweatpants enthusiast who never considered buying a pair of loafers, this guide will help you put together a more formal outfit for your friend or family member’s big day. And even if you’re already into wearing Thom Browne shirting with slacks, this guide will hopefully give you styling tips you may not have considered.
Here are some tips for how men should dress for weddings.
Understand The Dress Code and Follow It
Whether it’s black tie, cocktail, dressy casual, or beach formal, the dress code printed on a wedding invitation is not something to overlook. And if you grew up prescribing to “White Tee Wednesday,” you can certainly adhere to whatever dress code is required at a wedding. No matter how well you personally dress, or what your relationship is to the couple, you’re not above the dress code. So please understand what it is and make a valiant effort to follow it.
One of the stricter dress codes is black tie. If you see this on an invite, get ready to buy or rent a tuxedo, a black bow tie, a black vest, and a decent pair of formal black leather shoes—we’ll talk about wearing sneakers later. If it’s formal black tie or black tie optional, this means that a tuxedo is optional. Instead, you can also choose to wear a formal dark-colored suit with a white dress shirt and a formal tie. But still lean more formal than casual. A good reference point to look at for more formal dress codes is how Jay-Z dresses for the Grammys or how Kanye’s entourage dressed during the “Rosewood” era. It’s also important to follow non-Western wedding dress codes when asked. A traditional Indian, Korean, Mexican, or Zulu wedding dress code will call for more specific attire than what’s outlined throughout this guide. Always be respectful of what dress code the couple asks for.
On the more relaxed side of dress codes are cocktail, semi-formal/dressy casual, festive, and casual. Cocktail is one of the most likely dress codes you’ll come across because it’s not too stuffy but also not very casual. For cocktail weddings, guys should still wear a classy suit and tie. These stricter suit-and-tie dress codes start to loosen a little when it becomes semi-formal or dressy casual, which still calls for dressing up but has a tad bit more freedom. We’ll explain what that freedom could look like later on in this guide. But if you’re still not clear about the wedding’s dress code, don’t hesitate to look it up and do some thorough research to figure out what would be appropriate. If all else fails, ask some other guests what they plan on wearing to generate some ideas.
Take the Season and Time of Day Into Consideration
After researching the dress code, the next step is thinking about what to wear when considering the time of day and season. For example, if a black tie optional wedding is held in the summer, a white dinner jacket with black slacks looks classy. Suits made out of cotton or linen will keep you breezy in the spring or summer. But other formalwear made from tweed, flannel, or wool will keep you warm for weddings in autumn or winter. But please, no matter how cold it is, leave the Nuptse jacket and Timbs combo at home if the dress code is formal. The couple will likely dress for the season as well, so don’t be afraid to wear a pair of knit gloves or an elegant scarf during colder months. Understanding what looks to wear for a certain time of day can also help greatly when no specific dress code is listed. Weddings held during the day usually lean more casual whereas evening affairs call for more dressed-up looks.
“White Tie” Means a Coat with Tails, Not All White. In Fact, Never Wear All White
The odds of you getting invited to a wedding with a white tie dress code is almost as likely as having dinner with Jay-Z. Outside of weddings, one may only come across a white tie dress code if they are invited to a state dinner with the President of the United States. Also called “full evening dress,” “tails,” or “dress suit,” white tie is the highest level of formality when it comes to dress codes. If your loved one happens to hold a white tie wedding, they're either someone who’s actually high up on the social ladder or probably just full of themselves. Trust us, you’ll likely know.
If you do ever get invited to a white tie wedding though, it’s relatively similar to black tie. The only difference is that you must wear a tuxedo with tails or an evening tailcoat, an upscale white shirt, a white vest, and a white bow tie. A good point of reference is to look at how old Hollywood movie stars like Fred Astaire dressed in the 1935 film Top Hat or how Barack Obama dressed when meeting Queen Elizabeth II in 2016. Formal black footwear, such as Derby shoes or Oxfords, are also a must.
Speaking about white tie, what’s more important to remember when dressing for weddings is to stray away from Biggie Smalls’ Frank White persona. Never show up in an all-white outfit. While an all-white fit always looks great outside of weddings (white tees with fresh Air Force 1s never fail) you have to remember what color the bride is primarily associated with on the big day. So please, don’t awkwardly be the only person dressed in all white. Leave that to the bride.
Don’t Underestimate Tailoring. If It Doesn't Fit, Get It Fixed.
By now, it’s pretty clear that dressing for a wedding can become a pricey affair. But if the dress code leans more formal, buying a tailor-made suit could be worth it in the long run. A tailored suit will guarantee that you’ll look your sharpest as a wedding day guest. Unfortunately, it will likely come with some sticker shock when your tailor rings up a $1,000 bill for a custom-made look. So if you’re looking to save, it’s wise to check out stores like Nordstrom Rack, Men’s Wearhouse, Sak’s Off 5th, or Jos. A. Bank for discount suiting.
However, buying suits off the clearance rack does not mean tailoring should be overlooked. Yes, even a good discounted suit could cost as much as a new pair of Nikes off the SNKRS App. But putting even a bit more money down to get any imperfections tailored is going to make a huge difference. Those sleeves that run a little too long or those pants that are just a tad bit baggy can make or break a look.
With that being said, it’s imperative to look out for certain details when shopping for a discount suit that you’re planning to tailor. First, get a hold of measurements of your own body so you can avoid buying suit pieces that are too tight or short. Tailors can easily scale down length or width but would be hard pressed to lengthen or widen an existing garment. So find pieces that are a good fit but lean toward the roomier side.
This doesn’t mean buying an oversized suit that looks like it was designed by Demna for Balenciaga; a tailor can only alter a suit’s fit by so much so make sure it actually fits relatively well. If anything, make sure the shoulders fit. That’s because altering shoulders also requires altering a lot of other sections of the suit, which will cost more money and make for a risky tailoring job. If you don’t want to exhaust too much effort on finding a suit and tailor, retailers like Men’s Wearhouse will tailor suits on site. Suit rental sites like The Black Tux also let you add measurements online, offer free home try-ons, and let tailors re-hem rentals if needed.
Please Leave Those Sneakers at Home
While you can never go wrong wearing a fresh pair of Air Jordans, a wedding is one of those special occasions where you shouldn’t wear a pair of sneakers. While formal shoes may not be the most comfortable shoes to wear, it’s best to just follow the rule book. All of us can manage going through a little bit of pain when wearing some hard-bottomed wingtips. Even if the couple are sneakerheads who would appreciate seeing you in a pair of Off-White Nikes on any given day, they will likely find it to be a distracting departure from the dress code. Yes, unique sneakers will distinguish you from others, but it’s important to remember that the wedding isn’t about you at the end of the day. So just try to dress like everyone else and stick to the plan. Even for more casual weddings, it’s still best to still wear more conservative footwear styles like loafers if black leather dress shoes aren’t called for. We know that sneakers at weddings has become a bit more common in recent years, but trust us, leave them in the closet. Flexing your Air Jordan 11s with a tux on IG isn't as cool as you think it is. However, if you do happen to be invited to a wedding where sneakers are explicitly asked to be worn in the invite, pick a pair that’s calm and clean.
Wear a Comfortable Dress Shirt
Suit jackets, slacks, shoes, ties, and more: There are so many things to consider when landing that perfect wedding look that it makes shooting that perfect fit pic for Instagram look easy. But trust that one of the most integral garments not to glaze over when planning your wedding outfit is a comfortable dress shirt.
A dress shirt that fits properly and feels comfortable will feel as good as buying the perfect T-shirt from your favorite streetwear brand. The approach to buying a shirt for a wedding should be similar to buying a suit. Sizing and feel is key here. Again, take measurements of your own body before shopping and pay attention to how the shirt looks when tucked in. If it’s too small, it will feel too tight around the shoulders. If it’s too big, it’ll balloon from your waist when tucked in. While it’s easier to buy a shirt online off measurements, it’s best to try them on in-store so that you can be sure it fits.
When it comes to how it feels, pay attention to the season and your personal comfort. A shirt made out of lightweight fabrics like poplin or broadcloth can help you cool off during a ceremony held on a hot summer day. However, a matching undershirt would be necessary to avoid showing your chest. Otherwise, if you plan on taking off your suit jacket during the ceremonies, it would be wise to wear a shirt made from thicker Oxford fabrics or twill so that no one notices the bare arms underneath your shirt. Thicker shirts may also feel better if you’re sensitive to the cold during fall or winter weddings. Also, no one wants to see your sweat stains after dancing to “Macarena” and “The Electric Slide” back to back.
As for color, a white shirt is necessary for a black tie dress code and is generally the safest option to go with. But feel free to pick another solid color if the wedding’s dress code leans more casual. Just make sure the color coordinates with your suit. Shirts also come with many different types of collars. While it’s suggested to pick a collar based on how it looks around your face, it’s a miniscule detail that is more up to personal preference. But whether you go with a classic collar or a wing-tip, use collar stays to prevent it from looking disheveled during the proceedings. Aside from that, what type of plackets or cuffs a shirt should have, or if it’s alright to wear a shirt with a pocket, is all a personal choice. Just please don’t show up wearing a Marni or Supreme button-up with a huge graphic print. A clean white shirt will cost nothing and be far more appropriate for the occasion.
Ties Can Be a Dealbreaker. Buy One That Matches Your Outfit
The one accessory men don’t really have to worry too much about is picking the right tie. Aside from black tie or white tie dress codes, which explicitly require black and white bow ties respectively, ties are completely optional. But even if the dress code doesn’t call for one, a tie rounds out an already dapper wedding outfit. What’s also nice about ties is that there’s room for some creative freedom. Whether it’s a bow tie or neck tie, the main thing to really look for when picking one is to match or coordinate with the overall color of your outfit. And if you are going with a plus one or your significant other, it's always easy to match with the color they are wearing.
Aside from that, just make sure you know how to tie one correctly or get a buddy to do it for you. Although clip-on ties are an easy solution, it’s like having Velcro straps for sneakers—just don’t do it. And while you may be able to get away with wearing a more unique tie, still try to aim on the calmer side of things. A solid-color designer tie by Gucci or Prada is a luxurious but sophisticated option. But a Givenchy “Rottweiler” tie or something that almost looks like a graphic T-shirt is probably best saved for another occasion.
Accessorize Well, But Don’t Overdo It.
Any stylish person who loves dressing up can easily get lost in the sauce when it comes to accessorizing. While no one will bat an eye about all the jewelry, necklaces, handbags, and hats you like to throw on when styling yourself daily, a wedding is not the place to show that off. It’s best to keep it minimal at a wedding. While rappers like Tyler, The Creator look great when carrying around Goyard Cassette Trunk bags, wearing something similar could come off as being a little too showy at your best friend or family member’s wedding.. Fancy watches, stylish rings, necklaces, crazy socks, and other accessories that may draw way too much attention to yourself are likely best left at home. Remember, it’s the couple’s day to flex, not yours.
There are still many great accessories you can wear to make your wedding day fit stand out without looking ostentatious. Consider picking up a nice pocket square for your suit, but make sure it’s a color that complements your suit and tie but doesn’t exactly match either. A subtle lapel pin added to the left lapel of a suit jacket is also a nice and calm accessory. But remember that boutonnieres (which are actual flowers added to lapels) are reserved for the couple and important wedding guests such as bridesmaids and groomsmen. Lastly, cuff links. While you can certainly splurge on these, keep it chill. Brooks Brothers offers a simple knotted cuff link for less than $10. But if you’re all about that “quiet luxury,” labels like Cartier also offer elegant but subtle options. ven if only a handful of people will spot your cuff links, please don’t be that guy shaking the groom’s hand with a flashy diamond-encrusted pair. Again, please leave the flex at home.
A Fresh Haircut Will Go a Long Way
It’s true that creating the perfect wedding day outfit can get hectic. As the date approaches, you can be scrambling to get your pants tailored, picking up the right tie, or getting wrinkles out of their perfect white shirts at the dry cleaners. So, it’s easy to forget one of the most important parts of your look has nothing to do with your clothes: a fresh haircut. While the perfect hairstyle is more paramount for the couple, you know when your hair looks best. So if you notice your hair is starting to look out of whack before the big day, it might be wise to schedule an appointment with your barber at least a week before the wedding. Do not underestimate basic grooming too. Those with mustaches and beards should make sure their facial hair looks sharp. Others who enjoy a clean shave should properly follow a guide on how to give yourself the cleanest shave possible. But when it comes to grooming, remember that this is your own personal preference and what you personally think looks good. If the couple requests that you change your longtime personal hairstyle before the event, you have every right to decline. But if you were suddenly considering dyeing your hair red or to do something radically different right before the wedding, it’s best to perhaps wait until later.
A Casual Dress Code Does Not Mean Anything Goes
Many of us may breathe a sigh of relief when we see that the dress code for an upcoming wedding is casual. But let’s be clear, that does not mean you can pull up to thewedding with a Stüssy T-shirt and Dunks. Unless it’s specifically asked for, it’s best to go to a casual wedding in a tracksuit like Central Cee, who declared that he would even wear trackies to his own wedding after the internet criticized his red carpet look at the 2022 British Fashion Awards. While no one is going to stop you if you choose to be as bold as Cench, casual dress codes still call for formal looks. A good reference point to look towards is prep style and brands like Ralph Lauren or J. Crew. While you can opt out of a suit jacket and a formal white shirt, definitely stick to a shirt with a collar of some sort. T-shirts should definitely be left at home. And although there are some amazing graphic polo shirts out there, a plain color one would be best. Chinos can be worn rather than slacks, but jeans or workwear pants are a little too casual, and definitely avoid shorts. While a Hawaiian shirt is a little too out there, pinstripes, plaid and other traditional patterns can be worn instead of plain colored shirts. As mentioned before, while you may have more flexibility, stick with more formal shoes rather than sneakers or mules.
Don’t Overthink. Whatever You End Up Wearing, Remain Confident in Your Decision
No matter what, you’re not going to have the perfect wedding outfit. Even if you follow all these steps, read several guides, and feel pretty good about what you put together, you’ll still question if your outfit is any good. But what’s far more important than how you dress is your presence. A smile and a positive demeanor throughout the ceremony is going to look better than any tie you choose. So whatever fit you land on, arrive at the wedding with confidence and be ready to celebrate one of the most important days of your friend or family member’s life.