Judging The Looks From Last Night's Victoria's Secret Fashion Show

Image via Complex Original

Do girls really want to wear wings? Do they just really like wings? Do focus groups show that guys really like girls who wear wings? I clearly don’t get the wings.

Yo, I have no idea what is going on here. Looks like Milli Vanilli is dance-fighting a robot in a tutu.

If my girl showed up in this getup I’d be like, “IT’S TOO EARLY FOR CHRISTMAS SHIT. YOU WERE JUST YAPPING ABOUT PUMPKIN SPICE LATTES AND THANKSGIVING HASN’T EVEN HAPPENED YET.”

You see girls wearing swimsuits with weird straps and cutouts like this at the rooftop pools of hotels near the High Line.

Sexy, coked out Grimace.

Business Insider described this as a “…dark and sultry feel.” Sure, if by "dark and sultry" you mean Halloween at the Phi Alpha Ki house.

“I’m a sexy Eiffel Tower.”

Shoutout to your abs tho. That all cardio and weight training? Juice cleanse? What’s your secret?”

Just kidding. We all know it's cocaine.

Look at those guys. There are literally chicks with tiny Eiffel Towers on their heads and this guy still managed to have the dumbest alphet at the entire function. Is Fall Out Boy cool again? Was Fall Out Boy ever cool? Why is Mr. Fall Out Boy dressed like a kid who just got fired from Hot Topic for stealing?

Bless up Joan Smalls. I would totally be all, “You’re killin me Smalls” every time she accidentally spilled the French Press. But I’d always clean it up because when you date Joan Smalls you do anything to keep Joan Smalls.

This is what happens when you let your kids have access to a cell phone and the Internet at an early age.

I get it! ANGELS HAVE WINGS! According to Business Insider, the wings are a sign of stature amongst the Victoria’s Secret models. You have to stab a bitch with a stiletto to get your first pair of wings. Victoria's best kept secret is that it's a blood in, blood out type operation.

Yo, who got paid to style this? THIS IS WHAT’S WRONG WITH AMERICA'S ECONOMY.

Majoy LOLZ at that tiny little hat. It’s like she Hulked out of her outfit. Who's sexier? Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde?

To earn wings this fucking ridiculous, she must’ve had to take out, like, five basic Frederick’s of Hollywood chicks.

My eyes have headaches.

One time on a trip to Spain I got really really drunk at some strange discoteca and there were girls dressed like this dancing in front of giant coolers of Heineken. One girl left her cooler unattended for five minutes and, subsequently, my friend fell down an entire flight of stairs that night.

I like that this outfit comes with sleeves because it is a more conservative look.

Note to Self: Halloween costume idea for next year, Sexy Walmart Worker.

Honestly, with a few sublte tweaks, this could be street style at the latest Odd Future merch drop.