On today's episode of The Week In Bucket Hats, we're gonna discuss how I would become a cocaine importer if given the opportunity. Why a cocaine Importer? Because it would allow me the funds and excessive amount of narcotics driven ego to do things like order a Polo floral bucket hat from England. If I had to move the cocaine I imported from Bolivia by way of various other South American countries, I would own a bunch of tow truck companies. See, I would secure the government contracts to tow abandoned cars, which would be used on the low as drug receptacles. The tow truck drivers would have plausible deniability—“Hey man, I just pick up the cars”—and having only one part of a complicated conspiracy plot even remotely make sense is all you really need for things to work out from my understanding. I JUST WROTE FAST AND THE FURIOUS 7.
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