This is the subject line I got when this video was forwarded to me by my editor: "BEST VIDEO OF ALL TIME OF AN ADULT MALE WHO USES HEELYS TO TRAVERSE THE AIRPORT LMAO." And, to be honest, once the initial feelings of disgust and the urge for someone to stick their foot out in an effort to absolutely body this dude, like me, you'll realize you're actually insanely jealous of this guy: The grown ass man who, a year ago, "was frustrated [he didn't] get good exercise while traveling," discovered they make adult sized Heelys (or maybe just Heelys for kids with really big feet?), realized that he is impervious to the super-ego and all notions of social decorum, copped a selfie stick, flexed on all the hating ass haters at the airport and became an absolute fucking LEGEND in the process. I'm so bummed that I care about the opinions of other human beings to the point where I stop myself from bombing the concourses of my local international terminal. It is truly nothing to do a stunt for Jan Rezab. Take lessons.