The 25 Best Segments of Top Gear of All Time

The BBC's Top Gear isn't just "the most watched factual programme in the world," it's also the best damn car show to have ever been made. There are people who couldn't care less about cars that love Top Gear, much to the delight of boyfriends everywhere, and the stunts, adventures, and road tests have become so iconic that you can't film a car without being compared to the venerable British motoring show.

Of course, some bits have been better than others, and we've picked our favorite segments of all time, be they brief moments or hour long specials revolving around trips to exotic locales. Make sure you've seen all of The 25 Best Segments of Top Gear of All Time before you complain to us about how we're idiots for not including your personal favorite.

RELATED: 10 Reasons Why American Car Shows Suck

Episode: Season 8, Episode 2

"This is a canoe, or kayak to be precise, and it's rubbish because it doesn't have an engine."

A common Top Gear formula is we're going to race a car against an [extreme sports something], and while those are almost always entertaining, there w2as something magically crazy about this race. The Bowler Tomcat is one of the greatest off-road racers in the world, and it was racing a kayak that couldn't float unless the engine was running in a lake full of ice that could stall the engine.

Episode: Season 15, Episode 4

For a short time, Captain Slow was the fastest driver in the world. Why, because he was given the fastest car in the world, and a track that had a long enough straight for it to actually hit top speed. We're jealous.

Episode: Season 6, Episode 5
Part 2 Link

As it turns out, if you're trying to not be shot by the Irish Army, neither the Porsche or the Mercedes is very good. One of the cars proved better, but that might have just been because the army adjusted its tactics after the first run. This test was in no way scientific, but it was very amusing.

Episode: Season 14, Episode 2

This is what happens when three idiots try to make a Fisker Karma in a shed. This hideous box was hideous, and AutoCar called it "the slowest car we have tested this century" but the underlying idea of powering a vehicle with an efficient diesel charging a battery is, in fact, sound.

Episode: Season 13, Episode 2

The pranks are always good on Top Gear, but this one had some of the best...particularly the one with May's stereo. When it comes to car-related entertainment, facetious buyer's advice is one of our favorite genres too, and this was nothing but that.

Episode: Season 4, Episode 4

They may be cheap cars, but they're still expensive darts. That said, if Complex's office was a bit bigger we'd want a car darts set in the break room.

Episode: Season 16, Episode 2

Three wise men they surely are not, but we wager they're more fun to watch. Some Christians weren't too happy about the depiction of the baby Jesus in this one, but we think they need to sprout a sense of humor. We know plenty of Christians who enjoyed this special, despite the blasphemy.

Episode: Season 10, Episode 3

There's no shame in losing to either, that's for sure. Top Gear has shown us a ton of drag races over the years, often between unusual subjects, but this one takes the cake for craziest and most extreme.

Episode: Season 17, Episode 1

Who wants an RPG-proof car? We do. It might be a bit large, and taking it through a drive-through clearly isn't a very good idea, but we'd love to spend a day being that lunatic that everybody is gawking at.

Episode: Season 8, Episode 1

There has only ever been one DNF hot lap, and this was it. That said, the newer Stigs have been much better than the old, black stig. We don't think Ben Collins or whoever is the Stig now would have fared so poorly.

Episode: Season 9, Episode 3

Shit got serious in Alabama. As it turns out, writing phrases like "NASCAR sucks" and "Hillary Clinton for President" on your car doesn't make you many friends in rural Alabama.

Episode: Season 19, Episode 5

Remember, old English ladies all got used to being bombed on a daily basis during the war, so an airbag equipped bumper is hardly cause for concern. Despite all of the idiotic features of this car, a few of them were actually pretty good, like the speedometer.

Episode: Season 10, Episode 3

The episode in which the tallest man on British television takes the world's smallest car to his office was just too much fun. The best part was that, given the diminutive stature of the Peel, he didn't just commute to the building's parking lot, he drove right into the meeting room.

Episode: Off-Season Special

More amazing that the attempt to drive a truck to the North pole was the fact that Hammond actually managed to dog sled there without keeling over...he just had a little cry, that's all.

The painfully slow progress of the truck, at one point covering only a handful of miles in a day, meant that it's not like any of the hosts escaped the trip without hardship. So much for Clarkson's idea of a "luxury expedition to the North pole."

Episode: Season 11, Episode 5

"Perilously close to Wales."

We think this is one of the most underrated episodes of all time. Top Gear's lopsided races are always good, but the bizarre spactacle of Richard Hammond, who was actually pretty damn good on a horse, following a pack of dogs chasing a small Japanese SUV that was soaked in fox urine was fantastic.

Episode: Season 14, Episode 6

Normally sheer speed is the subject of Top Gear, but every now and then rugged off-roaders take the stage, and they were tested hard in South America. There were sand dunes that looked like mountains, the terrifying "death road," elevations so great that the engines could barely run, a hilarious river crossing, and lush, thick jungle...oh, and bugs. There were lots of bugs.

Episode: Season 15, Episode 1

As it turns out, the Reliant Robin has a bit of a design flaw. A design flaw that Clarkson exploits to hilarious effect as he attempts to drive what might be the worst engineered car of all time with his usual lead-footed spirit.

Episode: Season 6, Episode 1

Why isn't this a sport yet? Seriously, there's not a person alive who saw this segment and didn't want to immediately go out and play a game. It does, however, seem like a rather expensive sport to play, which explains why Car Football/Soccer leagues haven't been popping up all over the place.

Episodes: Season 3, Episodes 5 and 6
Part 2 Link

It started off fairly light, but by the end that Hilux was still running after being tossed in the ocean for a few hours, burned, and set atop an exploding building. We think that everyody who has seen this has looked on eBay for and old diesel Hilux at least once on account of this particular destructive test.

Episode: Season 9, Episode 4

The was probably the most ambitious Top Gear has ever been. Making a space shuttle out of one of the worst cars ever made, based purely on the logic that it's "quite pointy," was an insane, and expensive, undertaking.

The end, however, was heart-breaking.

Episodes: Season 8, Episode 3 and Season 10, Episode 2
Part 2 Link

While the world record for crossing the channel in an amphibious car still hasn't been bested, it's a miracle that the hosts are still with us after first making three stupid contraptions, and then making three more stupid contraptions, sinking two, and piling in the third. What's most amazing is that one of these cars actually worked.

Episode: Season 12, Episode 6

This is the greatest car review in the history of automotive journalism, as it was very thourough. It may have even been too thourough. The testing of the car was turned up to 11 in a way that nobody predicted. Absolutely brilliant.

Episode: Season 5, Episode 9

"My epiglottis is full of bees!" A normal man would wear a helmet while testing the Ariel Atom, but Jeremy Clarkson is no normal man. Without this abnormality, the distinguished field of meme-craft would have never been granted the hilarious images of the Clarkson's face billowing in the wind.

Episode: Season 12, Episode 8

Amazingly, an episode that didn't actually feature any cars was one of Top Gear's greatest. From the somber recollections of the war to the jokes about the war that were in wonderfully poor taste, this road trip was one of the best.

The scenery of Vietnam was probably the best the show has ever had. The wilder parts of the country all look like the setting of a fantasy epic.

Episode: Season 10, Episode 4

The Botswana special was not only the usual assortment of automotive awesomeness and hilarious assholery, but it was also an incredible record of what was clearly one of the greatest road trips ever taken. Records were broken, amazing things were seen, an attempt to hide male pattern baldness was mocked, and a small car was named "Oliver."\

You'll be happy to knwo that Oliver is now treated very nicely by Hammond, who shipped the car back to England after the special wrapped.