Date: 8/11/2012

If you're looking for a way to lose your girl and your job in a mere matter of days, you need look no farther than Chad Ocho, er, whatever he goes by now. When will homies learn that you have to destroy the evidence? We've all heard the story by now. Chad's newlywed wife Evelyn came home from shopping and found a receipt for a box of condoms.*cue the fireworks* Voices were raised, shouting ensued, and Chad Johnson lost his shit and consequently head-butted his wife. And to think he tried to play it off like she was the one who head-butted him. Tell us then, Chad. Why was she was the one with the three-inch cut on her forehead? We'll wait.