Image via Complex Original
The male bathroom is not usually a hi-tech environment: we're lucky if we can even keep it fit for human use. If black hairs don't line the sink and your toothbrush is younger than your neice, then you are probably in the top ten percent of male bathroom owners. Just because the status quo among men is to maintain a lavatory that would make Cro Magnon man blush doesn't mean it has to be that way. There are innumerable companies making bathroom gadgets than can improve your hygiene and make your life easier. Sure, the products on the market run the gamut from insanely practical to clearly produced by an insane person, but that shouldn't stop you from wading into the tech world to see if the right grooming gadget is waiting for you on the next page of that Sharper Image catalog. We're not saying you should necessariliy open your wallet, but at least open your luddite mind; you might just thank yourself for it later when your white teeth and moisturized face land your some tech-loving ass. The future is here, and it is clean shaven: here are 10 Hi-Tech Toiletries You Never Knew You Needed.
Magnetic Soap Holder
Buy It Now: $15
If you've ever spent half of your precious shower time fumbling for an escaped bar of soap, you'll see the value in this device. Gone are the days of risking major injury blindly grabbing for that lost soap bar as you pray that you don't fall and injure yourself in a manner normally reserved for men over the age of eighty. We won't waste your time with a string of jokes about how you'll never "drop the soap" again, no matter how much we may want to, but suffice it to say that we're happy to see Soap On A Rope has taken a crucial step into the twenty-first century.
Phillips AirFloss
Buy It Now: $80
If there's one thing we're lax on besides alimony payments, it's flossing. Though we are made well aware of the benefits every time we step into the dentist's chair, it is just such a pain. Maybe if you hit your wallet hard enough, you'll find the motivation you need to clean beneath your teeth. That's where the Phillips Air Floss comes in. As an alternative to cleaning between your teeth with white string, the AirFloss sends air and water between your teeth knock out the dirt that creeps between the crevices. Even the most generous reviews maintain that this device is no better than flossing, but since you don't floss anyway, just focus on the fact that this machine beats brushing alone.
The Bonsai
Buy It Now: Their Indiegogo campaign came up short, and the Bonsai team is currently exploring other options.
At first glance, The Bonsai is just a cup that holds your shaving water. It is that and so much more. Craig Battin is sick of how much water we waste, and while he can't fix our overconsumption over night, he has a solution that takes a step in the right direction. The Bonsai uses just 2.5 ounces of water, but gives your razor a next level rinse. During your shave, you keep the Bonsai on standby to spray your razor clean, trap excess hair, and lubricate your blade for a closer shave. Not only do you get better results than you can expect from your standard sink rinse, but you could save up to 10 gallons of water per shave. Though people are excited about the Bonsai, apparently they aren't excited enough. The Bonsai has gotten plenty of media buzz, but that hasn't translated into funds. Their Indiegogo has fallen well short of Battin's goal. Battin and his team at Blackpine are currently exploring options for bringing the Bonsai to market. Until then, you'll have to continue wasting water like the inconsiderate, Earth killing swine you are.
Carzor
Buy It Now: $9.99
We've all been there: you groggily look in the mirror first thing in the morning and think, "Wow, what a debonair five o'clock shadow." You hustle through your commute and once you land in front of another mirror with clearer, caffeine-filled eyes, you realize that your facial hair looks scraggly and lame. You got up thinking you looked like George Clooney only to find out that you were closer to Shaggy from Scooby-Doo. There is now a solution for those of us who tend to push our facial hair to the limit and wish we could scale it back on the fly.
While "Carzor" (Get it? Card + Razor) sounds like a name better suited to a Transformer than a shaving product, we approve of the design, even if the name leaves something to be desired. This portable razor and mirror combo is roughly the size of a credit card and will fit in your wallet. If you're anything like us and you've purchased a crappy, over-priced BIC from your local Rite-Aid in a jam, you're probably all in. Just in case you're still on the fence, you should know that the Carzor comes in a number of scents including sandal, ocean, and mint. Finally, a way to keep our face baby-faced and minty fresh on the go.
Dews Self-Balancing Toothbrush
Buy It Now: The DEWS Toothbrush is still in concept stage.
There are many things that are impossible to balance in life, from your irresponsibly managed check book to your multiple secret families. While we can't help with those higher degree of difficulty situations, it looks like you may soon be able to bring balance to your toothbrush game. We're all tired of placing our toothbrushes in small porcelain cups that we end up breaking anyway, and those mini-toothbrush racks are hard to navigate first thing in the morning. Soon enough, you might be liberated from the tyranny of toothbrush containers thanks to the good people at Ryan Harc.
This dextrous toothbrush is amazing, and like most amazing things, it isn't available yet. Though the design of the DEWS toothbrush has earned industry awards and a fair share of blog attention, it is not yet in mass production. We'll be waiting with baited breath for the day that we can leave our clumsy old toothbrushes behind.
HairMax LaserComb
Buy It Now: $545
If you didn't already know that life was cruel and unfair, you'll be made keenly aware of that fact shortly after college graduation. Some of your friends whose collegiate studies barely extended over the edge of their custom-made bong will land six figure jobs while others suffer through the unemployment line. Some of your buds will land inexplicably attractive girlfriends despite their ever-growing beer gut, largely due to their six figure jobs. You probably already saw these things coming. One thing you might not be prepared for is that some of your friends will lose their hair as soon as they take off that graduation cap while others will take a full head of luxurious locks with them to the grave. It's tough holding back time's cruel march over your thinning scalp, but if you're starting to have more in common with Elmer Fudd than a distaste for rabbits, it might be time to give this magic comb a shot. Don't worry, the HairMax is FDA approved, so lasers are officially not just for world-conquering madmen anymore. Enjoy.
Clarisonic Mia Sonic Skin Cleansing Systen
Buy It Now: $125
"Our smallest Sonic Skin Cleansing System, the one-button, one-speed Mia comes in a variety of colors and fits your active lifestyle – offering beautiful skin at home or on-the-go."
It's like a toothbrush for your face, folks, and thank God it fits our active lifestyle. If you have always dreamed of having a face like Christian Bale in American Psycho, but don't want to deal with all of the facials and brutally murdering people to get it, the Clarisonic Mia might just be for you. Now you can finally get all of that dirt and dead skin that people can't see because it is largely in your imagination off of your face. Ladies will flock to you once they notice just how clean your face is after examining your visage thoroughly with a magnifying glass in the club. Of course, they will likely leave you once they see your Clarisonic Mia Sonic Skin Cleansing System in your bathroom and realize just how vain you are, but until then, let the good times roll and put your cleanest face forward.
GLO Brilliant Personal Teeth Whitening Device
Buy It Now: $299
Teeth whitening has become an arms race in recent years. Just as bros in the club need to have the spikiest hair and the douchiest Ed Hardy shirt, now they also do all they can to further whiten those already pearly whites. Your going to need more than just simple whitening gel to make those teeth so ghostly that women will be blinded by those glistening fangs. That's where your GLO Brilliant Personal Teeth Whitening Device (catchy name, huh?) comes in. How does this scary looking device work? Well, LED lights embedded in the mouthpiece add heat and light to your teeth whitening gel to amplify the level of whiteness while cutting down on wait time. Dude, your teeth are going to be so white, it's going to be amazing. You'll never wait behind another velvet rope again: just flash those sexy molars and doors will open for you wherever you go.
Water Pebble
Buy It Now: $17
Here is a tool for those of you who are conservation-minded or just tend to hang in the shower too long. Program your Water Pebble to tell you when you should be finished with the shower so that you have enough time to make yourself beautiful before you head out to face the cruel world. If you spend too much time sobbing and cursing what your life has become with the water on full blast so your roommates can't hear, the Pebble is going to let you know with cool light-up effects. Our first thought when hearing about this is that our water bill-obsessed parents would have loved this while we were growing up. Then we thought about if for a second and concluded that this would have just been another device to ignore, just like our alarm.
Violife Stealth UV Toothbrush Sanitizer
Buy It Now: $50
Germaphobes rejoice. To this point, you've mostly only had water-based toothbrush cleaners to indulge your Howard Hughes-style obsession with staying germ-free. Now you can zap germs into oblivion with this nifty UV light. Not only does this high-tech bacteria killer eliminate 99.9 percent of those pesky germs, but the cool, modern-arty design will make your girl forget that you are unhinged enough to buy what is essentially an anti-germ ray gun.
