When Jimmy Kimmel takes his enthusiastic inquiries to the streets, you know things are going to get really real really fast. For Monday's round of pedestrian questioning, Kimmel hit random people with a very timely topic of discourse: medical marijuana cards. "Our country is almost now officially half-baked," Kimmel said of the growing number of states hitting their citizens with the joys of legalization. "I have to say, our state California was the first to legalize marijuana for medical use but we aren't so strict when it comes to why doctors can prescribe marijuana."

To really dive into this fascinating slice of California living, Kimmel asked random people if they were in possession of a medical marijuana card. Then, as any good round of pedestrian questioning must also include a proper follow-up, Kimmel got each person to reveal the official diagnosis that earned them the privilege of medical weed. The answers to that question, thankfully, do not disappoint.

"I do," one woman answered. "The condition is children, jobs, life." If that sounds absolutely perfect, that's because it is. "You know there's a zero percent survival rate on life," Kimmel noted wisely. The other weed-inspiring conditions, at least as revealed by Kimmel's sampling of Los Angeles, range from suspect glaucoma to a generous son keen on keeping his dad quite happy indeed.

Perhaps Kimmel should take his pedestrian questioning skills over to Pennsylvania, as the state just officially legalized medical marijuana for its weed-starved residents on Sunday. "We stopped being politicians and started being human beings," Sen. Daylin Leach told WPVI of the state's bipartisan efforts. Human beings, as Kimmel clearly displays in this video, are pretty great.