The 25 Best Looking Sideline Chicks in Games

She’s a “Witch of the Wild.” Wow, as if we weren’t intimidated enough already. Morrigan can’t stand human beings, but we’re sure she’d make a special exception for us. Ay, if the Warden can get a shot at some medieval lovin’ with this killer sorceress, we can, too. She hates matters that deal with the heart because she’s the definition of power-hungry. We’re glad we had her zappin’ fools with her spells by our side.

She managed to get a police officer whipped with little effort involved. She jacked some valuable info from Umbrella, and stole a man’s heart at the same time. Damn, that’s sexy! Ada Wong plays her secret agent position like a true pro. She handled herself real well during the Raccoon City incident and the Las Plagas breakout. We can’t help but feel a fatal attraction to this lady in the red dress. Does Ada have a strong resemblance to that chick from La Femme Nikita or is it just us? *ponders to self*

If we ever have to travel to the very ends of the world and lay waste to some killer whale named Sin, we’d like to have Lulu by our side. The sexiest black mage of ‘em all does damage to everything in her way with a mixture of spells and lil’ badass dolls. The things she can do to you with a Mog doll in her hand, son? Destructive. We’re still kinda blown that Wakka of all people got Lulu pregnant. Now what kind of magic did he have to use to do that?

Any female that’s the boss of all bosses is OK in our book. Sylvia Christel holds it down for the United Assassins Association by setting up deathmatches between the world’s top assassins. Plus, she’s a huge flirt! Promising Travis Touchdown some victory punany if he ever gets ranked #1 just sounds like a huge tease that’ll end in disappointment. We don’t care, though, cause we’d definitely cut a few more heads off just to get a love session with boss lady.

We understand Monkey being all pissed off and whatnot after this woman placed a slave headband on him. But ultimately, he really shouldn’t be too upset. Is there really a reason to complain when you’re shackled up to our girl Trip? She’s the perfect mixture of beauty and brains that a brute like Monkey needs by his side. Hope she ends up finding her way back to us in the East…

The “Mad” in front of “Moxxi” describes this woman quite well. After going through three different husbands, Mad Moxxi decided to bide her time by building a colossal arena called The Underdome. Reason being? Oh, nothing really. She just needed to get her gladiator spectator fix until she came upon husband #4. Um…yeah. She scares us. There’s this thing called “zoosk.com.” You might wanna it check out, Moxxi!

Ms. Lawson has some pretty exclusive connections in the Mass Effect galaxy. Whose side is she really on? WHO CARES! As long as she’s packin’ heat and keeping space baddies at bay, we’ll take her on any mission we please. She rolls with the Cerberus organization that brought Commander Shepard back from the dead, so you might wanna thank her for her services.

Man do we have a thing for hot thieves, and Kasumi Goto is at the top of our list. There isn’t a ton of info on her and we’d like to keep it that way. Experienced space criminals never reveal their methods of jacking others. And getting her valuable assistance means getting in on a high profile heist with her. We don’t mind getting in on some stealing, cause she’s the one squad mate we always wanna have around.

RAINBOW! This is the battle cry of a badass female wrestler who was first introduced in Street Fighter Alpha: Rainbow FREAKIN’ Mika. We’ve broken enough fools’ necks with Zangief, so we were all but ready when a chick version of him was introduced to the game. Once we dropkicked and German suplexed the Chi out of Ryu, we stuck with Ms. Mika forever. Hey Capcom, any chances of her makin’ an appearance in Street Fighter X Tekken? Just sayin’.

If you ask us, Cloud had his eye on the wrong girl. We fucks wit’ Aerith and all that (trust us, we went to the funeral and everything) but our heart lies with Tifa Lockheart. She’s a bartender who could pass for a bouncer if ya get that Limit Break of her’s goin’. Tifa used those vicious hands and feet for some random monster killing in Final Fantasy VII. Did you see her go ham on that dude in the Church scene in Final Fantasy: Advent Children? Yeah, she goes hard for the kiddies.

Deadliest. Wig. Ever? Oh yeah, we’re talking about the new lady of rage here. Guilty Gear is known for being one of the craziest fighting games on the planet. Part of the reason why this series is regarded as such is because of the eccentric cast. Millia Rage stands out to us the most because she’s able to deal major damage…with nothing but her hair. Her blonde locks can turn into prison shanks, strangle you to death and fling the type of energy blades that would make Guile blush.

Love ninjas? How bout the female version known as kunoichi’s? Female ninjas like Ayane are just a wee bit more badass than your average shinobi. Kasumi’s cool and all, but we definitely prefer Ayane’s cold and killer demeanor. All those backflip kicks and spinning backfists she’s known for got us a lot of wins in Dead or Alive. We’d like to see her as a playable character in Ninja Gaiden 3. Once you see that flash of purple, it’s the last thing you’ll ever see.

For all our Tekken OGs out there, we’re gonna make you give us a round of applause on this one. Wondering who that fine ass environmentalist Julia Chang was birthed from? Michelle Chang. Who could forget her iconic western garb with the cowboy boots, pendant and Indian headband? Hailing from Arizona, Michelle was a master of Chinese kenpo and a beast when it came to suplexing dudes on concrete. Our main squad in Tekken Tag Tournament featured this mother-and-daughter combo. The family that whoops ass together…stays together.

Trish who? Lady is the side-chick who gets our respect the most. She even gets all the cred for Dante naming his shop of demon death “Devil May Cry” in the first place. And that enormous gun of hers? Simply godlike. Her pops did her and her mother dirty, so we could totally understand her trying to do him in herself. Lady’s missile launcher with that beast ass knife on the end of it is called MANPADS. If she ever catches us in a dark alley, we’ll be wearing a pair.

These female ninjas ain’t nothing to fuck wit, ain’t they? Maki made her first appearance in Final Fight 2 alongside her other Metro City hero teammates. Once word got out that her parents got kidnapped by the Mad Gears, the smoke bomb hit the fan. We couldn’t look away from this ninja cause that outfit was killin’ em (in more ways then one). When she came back in Capcom vs. SNK 2, we made sure to put her front and center on our squad.

All the comic book heads already know how voluptuous and downright sexy Poison Ivy is. Us gamers were finally blessed with a great Batman game, but the extra added bonus was getting a 3D rendered version of Miss Ivy. We didn’t wanna put her away when we were forced to fight her and her Godzilla-sized plant. All those sexual innuendos before the fight made us wanna put down the Batarang and make sweet love to her. It would probably be the last time we ever made love to her, though…

A female bouncer? And you’re not shook right now? Well, we’ll get ya scared in just a few more sentences then. King (no, not from Tekken) beat our asses all over her bar when we finally were made to stand across from her in battle. Her fashion sense knocked us out first, and we mean that in a good way. Her classy attire mixed with her “alley beatdown” gloves was swagged out to the maximum. When she laid that handkerchief down, fools were laid to rest. Muay Thai never looked so good!

Go ahead and say we’re into bestiality all you want! Bats shouldn’t have such awesome cleavage! Rouge the Chaos Emerald-stealing Bat is the yang to Knuckles’s yin. All those treasure-hunting skills she accrued over the years made her the go-to girl for doing some professional jacking for the government. She’d rather kick holes in her enemies with her high heels than punch ‘em into dust like her rival. We heart Rouge, and judging by her outfit, she hearts us too.

“I WILL KILL YOUR DICK!” ‘Nuff said. Oh you wanna hear more about Trischka? Sure thing. She knows her way around an automatic weapon, her foul mouthed tirades would make a dirty sailor blush and she’s the perfect sqaudmate to have around when you’re trying to escape a hostile planet. Seeing her kick a few numbskull aliens in the sack just feels a lil’ but more sinister than when the men do it. FINAL ECHO REPRESENT!

No woman on this list is more honorable than lady Sophitia. The things she can do with nothing but a simple sword and shield amazes us. The Greek Gods created a monster with this girl. She gracefully backflips over her opponents, flings her shield like a familiar American hero and shoves her sword straight into the heart of all evil doers. What’s not so honorable about her? That kick to the groin area grab she used to have. Not cool, Sophitia. Not cool…

What…a…fox. Carmelita Fox is the perfect foil for master thief Sly Cooper. She’s a by-the-books police officer who knows two things: crooks ain’t shit and the po-po needs to catch ‘em all like fugitive Pokémon. We had the time of our lives escaping from her with Sly during those chase sequences. She sure knows how to bust a shocking cap in someone’s ass with that tazer gun of her’s. She got a love thang for Sly. We got a love thang for Fox.

Why do treasure hunters happen to be the baddest chicks on the planet nowadays? Chloe Frazer travels the world and does fine work as a contracted fortune hunter. Ol’ girl is super nice with the firearms and reckless as hell when she starts poppin’ off. Her wisecracks seem to rival Nathan Drake’s jokes at times. We’d rather have Frazer rollin’ with us on a treasure expedition than some old dude with a whip any day of the week. Sorry Jones…

Where are all the Umbra Witches and how can we get one? Bayonetta was a serious mind trip that made us think “Dante who?” once the action picked up. The main lady’s rival, Jeanne, was just a tad bit more badass. Gray eyes, platinum colored hair and an extra tight red jumpsuit made Jeanne our favorite killer witch at first sight. She can do the same things as that Sarah Palin look-alike, and do it even better at times. Her pistols are named “All 4 One?” She gets extra points for being a Brand Nubian fan.

Video games are notorious for featuring oversexed female avatars that can kick ass with the best of em. We’ve looked up to Lara Croft, Ivy and Mai Shiranui for years now as the leading ladies with a breast measurement size of OMG. But who’s number one on that list now? Angel. She fights ½ (well 3/4) naked, and utilizes her feet to perform some vicious moves. She does her dirty work for her employers, NESTS, and does it well. Then, there’s the chest action. Lord, please forgive us for oogling an animated female character.

Kitana’s aight. Mileena’s yuckmouth frightens us. Sonya’s too serious for our taste. Jade, though? She’s just right. Jade plays her bodyguard role like a true pro. Shao Khan doesn’t just throw his trust around to anybody (because he usually kills everyone he meets), but he trusts Jade with the well being of his daughter. No one should be so lethal with a stripper pole (okay, we meant staff), but she’s capable of doing amazing things with it. Her fatality is the stuff of horrors. Just the way we like it.