Have you ever been to a gathering with one of your best homies and they bring around some new people, hoping you two connect? In their minds, they think y’all hit it off only to read a future text from you that reads, “Don’t bring that bird around me again.” That’s how I feel about most of the new characters on Love & Hip Hop Atlanta, who got much of the shine on last night’s episode.
It began with the cliffhanger from the previous edition—Joseline and Margeaux having a meeting of the happy hour cocktails. Joseline said she recognized Margeaux “from the blogs” and wanted to have a conversation about “the maid.” By the blogs, she means the production staff. Y’all know who the maid is. Margeaux informed Joseline that the whole porn tape hustle was Mimi’s idea—including the whole story about them leaving the “sex tape in a bag that was stolen at the airport.”
As for Mimi, she’s trying to get her MF Management Company off the ground. She met with Tiffany Foxx to apologize for her baby daddy being a drunken asshole at her showcase. Mimi then proceeded to throw out the name of every producer that is based in Atlanta in order to entice Tiffany to sign her. Thing is, Tiffany already has a manager she’s comfortable with, thus rendering this entire storyline moot. It did provide—dun-dun-dun—conflict later on with another potential MF Management act, Dime Piece.
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Dime Piece was immediately jealous of the idea of Mimi having another female rapper on her roster so when the two met at a meeting at Jazze Pha’s studio, all hell broke loose. I don’t know who hurt Dime Piece and didn’t hug her enough in life, but that’s not how you conduct business. I mean, VH1 reality show business, yes, but if you’re trying to move some singles off iTunes, you best learn how to behave, beloved. Tiffany Foxx called her a bitch and then left the meeting and all future meetings with Mimi Faust. Jazze Pha threw Dime Piece out and made Mimi look the fool.
I’m all for Mimi finding a hustle that doesn’t involve riding the irregular denim equivalent of her ex on camera, but she’s got to do better if she’s trying to get her Deb Antney on. This ain’t gon’ cut it, Mimi. Not in the least.
When I wasn’t rolling my eyes at Dime Piece, I was laughing my fucking face off at Momma Dee’s date with her ex-husband, Ernest. First of all, of course Momma Dee used to be married to a man named Ernest. Ernest took Momma Dee to a romantic dinner at the wing spot, which Momma Dee was not happy about. I know Momma Dee is regal, but who doesn’t love a lemon pepper, BBQ, honey mustard, spicy, teriyaki, or Korean fried wing? I mean, Ernest did just get out of jail so perhaps a romantic dinner consisting of some wild salmon purchased by way of EBT might’ve been fancier, but personally, I find a date at the wing spot endearing. If you can eat fried chicken with a bae, that’s a bae for life. YOU FEEL ME?
If you can eat fried chicken with a bae, that’s a bae for life. YOU FEEL ME?
Momma Dee was also less than impressed with Ernest’s romantic gesture: sneaking a ring onto a cherry in her drink, which might’ve been like Alize or a cosmo or something similar. Momma Dee explained in her confessional, to us, her kingdom: “You know my standards. A queen like me.” Momma Dee’s daughter hates Ernest and Ernest’s mama hates Momma Dee (she put her son in jail), but fret not since they’re going to have a dinner at Scrappy’s house where all of the weapons and alcohol will be hidden.
How does Momma Dee not having a dating show already?
After chuckling at thug love, I was surprised to see the sight of Faith Evans on this show. She visited Stevie J in rehab to promote her most recent album in the background music and plug her future album, a duets record with the Notorious B.I.G. Faith encouraged Stevie to get better and after they reminisced about the good old days, Faith suggested he produce for that concept album. Yeah, I don’t know if I want to hear that album, but I wish everyone the best.
Now, on to the real surprise of the show: There is a woman on this show named PREMADONNA. We met “The Queen of the Waist Shapers” by way of Joseline. The Puerto Rican Princess explained, “I don’t fool with too many of them hoes from Miami, but I met her through my homegirl, Blac Chyna and she’s about her business.” Of course Joseline knows Blac Chyna.
PREMADONNA (Jesus) was invited to some random party Joseline organized to basically introduce Margeaux to Karlie Redd, the Pearl Shay of LHHATL. So a few randoms pretended to belly dance in the background as Margeaux continued to put Mimi on full blast. PREMADONNA (yes, I gotta type that in all caps) noted, “I’m not pouring my tea to nobody, but I’m gon’ see it.”
Well said, woman with ridiculous ass name.
Next week, Margeaux and Mimi will finally meet each other. I’m going to swing by Ernest’s favorite dating spot, pick me up some wings, and make sure I’m right in front of my TV the very second that happens. See y’all next week and remember: Mimi Faust be lying like shit.
Michael Arceneaux hails from Houston, lives in Harlem, and praises Beyoncé’s name wherever he goes. Follow him @youngsinick.
