Unfortunately, the last time we counseled Meek Mill on how to vanquish Drake, the Philly battle rapper ignored our wisdom. For that, Meek Mill has suffered. But now that the jokes and brutal meme slideshows have subsided, we're sure that Meek Mill might could use our counsel to help pull himself up from the mat and make the most of this year, lest everyone forget that Meek Mill had the No. 1 best-selling album in July.
Let's try this again.
Delete All Social Media Apps
First off, forget ya phone and forget this particular Instagram post! There's plenty of rappers who excel at social media—Noreaga, Cormega, Vince Staples, and Nicki Minaj all come to mind—but Meek Mill is, inarguably, the most disastrous Twitter user since Justine Sacco! He's ignited not one but two huge rap beefs just on the strength of his tweets! Even after Meek had effectively forsaken social media for a couple summer weeks after Drake released "Back to Back," he inexplicably returned! So wedded to posturing and principle is Meek Mill that he's yet to just go on 'head and delete the infamous 'Z' tweet. Never forget! Never tweet!
My team stole my password from me! I'm just getting it back! Lol
— Meek Mill (@MeekMill) August 16, 2015Reconcile With Drake
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I'm not one to pass up a good rap beef, but this is not a good rap beef. This is Kool Moe Dee vs. LL Cool J in '91. It's just embarrassing at this point. The ghostwriting feud between Meek Mill and Drake might coulda been interesting five years ago, before Drake had brainwashed millions of English-speaking children into regarding lines like "got a deal with Apple, but I still feel en-TIDAL-ed" as something other than the corniest wordplay since "I Can." But now that we've established that pop sideliners born later than 2000 don't really care about hip-hop's premium on lyricism and singular ingenuity, this feud is crude and pointless and hopelessly passive-aggressive. If even Nas and Cam could patch their differences, I'm pretty sure Meek Mill and Drake could restore the cherished status quo of street rappers peaceably letting Drake leech his street cred in hopes of crossover success.
Drop the Hottest Possible Single With No Features
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One impressive element of the Dreams and Nightmares intro is its being 230 seconds of pure, compounding, unpunctuated Meek Mill. Otherwise, Meek hasn't had much success with feature-less singles. ("Monster" and "Check" are his best recent attempts.) If Meek Mill is gonna credibly reassert himself as an underdog, he's gotta re-enter the mix on his own terms and with a hook of his own. Can't be outchea looking like Nicki Minaj's Lil Cease or Renzel Rozay's charity case, especially now that Meek's back to dissing his own MMG labelmate, Wale.
Renzel Remix Blitz!
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If Meek Mill must diss Drake and if he's not gonna diss him on a massive hit single, his second-best option is to adopt the Renzel Remix Strategum—diss Drake in a prolonged series of freestyles over songs that are currently popping in the Top 40. Meek Mill should diss Drake over the "What Do U Mean?" beat. (**Meek Mill voice** What do you meeeeaaaaaan?..........I just wanna know.) Meek should ravage Drake over that one Selena Gomez song, too. Just leave Adele's "Hello" alone. Renzel already handled that.
Run Up on Drake at a Proper Battle
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The gravest, implicit insult of this now hilariously uneven feud is that Meek Mill, a battle rapper, has yet to score on a Canadian whose favorite rapper of all time is Lionel Richie. Drake has been ducking his assigned fade from Murda Mook for a while now, citing "corporate stuff," which suggests an advantage for Meek to hit Drake with Eminem levels of vulgarity and disrespect, which Drake will have to counter with strictly PG-13 raps only! Slap that Blackberry out of his hand! Pat Stay can't save the boy!
