DEA Needs a Contractor Who Can Burn 1,000 Pounds of Weed an Hour

The DEA is looking for a contractor in the Houston-area.

Members of the Drug Enforcement Administration

Image via Getty/RJ Sangosti/MediaNews Group/The Denver Post

Members of the Drug Enforcement Administration

The Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) has officially put up their "Help Wanted" signs. But, before you jump at this opportunity to fulfill some wild, action movie fantasy, here are some things you need to know about this position. One, it's freelance so it's not some Don Cheadle, Traffic type of thing. And two, you either have to love weed or hate it because the DEA needs a contractor that can burn at least 1,000 pounds of marijuana an hour.

According to Houston's KHOU, the enforcement agency is seeking a company in Houston that can incinerate various items including paperwork, cassette tapes, and other confiscated materials. Highlighted in the job's description is a required ability to burn 1,000 pounds of bulk marijuana an hour at a minimum rate of eight hours a day. This contract is said to run from late March to Sept. 30 with rotation at the DEA's Houston, Galveston, Beaumont, McAllen, Brownsville, Corpus Christi, Laredo, Eagle Pass, Del Rio, San Antonio, Austin, and Waco departments.

Of course, once this gig became news Houston's DEA claimed to receive an abundance of inquiries. As a result, they put to rest most of the applicants' hopes by explaining that they reserve the right to conduct thorough background checks and drug tests. Also, they issued a statement to KHOU in which they detail an operation of this size and importance is not the job for the average company. 

"Although we appreciate local citizens’ willingness to offer their help, this is a complicated, large-scale government contract we’re required by law to bid every few years, and there are usually only a handful of companies with the necessary facilities and resources to help us dispose of this material," the statement reads before explaining the severity of their jobs. 

"While it makes for an interesting headline, the truth is far more prosaic," the statement says. "our agents working across the Houston Division make a huge number of great cases, and as a result, we seize a tremendous amount of illegal drugs. Arranging for the save and effective destruction of these drugs is just part of the job."

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