If you woke up this morning with the confidence that your fellow human beings would surely not be discussing the size of Adolf Hitler's penis, then you were sadly mistaken. In addition to Hitler's previously alleged singular testicle, a new penis-referencing report from the Daily Star appears to confirm that he also possessed a "tiny, deformed" member. Hitler's allegedly diminutive phallus is reportedly referenced in medical records circa 1923, as noted in the recent book Hitler's Last Day: Minute by Minute.
"Hitler himself is believed to have had two forms of genital abnormality: an undescended testicle and a rare condition called penile hypospadias," historians Emma Craigie and Jonathan Mayo claim. Hypospadias, a profoundly rare medical condition, results in a urethra opening on the "under side" of the penis and reportedly impacts size. According to some experts, Hitler's own personal doctor also acknowledged his diminished penis and allegedly prescribed cocaine and hormones in an effort to boost his sex drive.
As previously reported, a Erlangen-Nuremberg University professor reportedly confirmed long-standing theories about the Nazi leader's testicles in December of last year. According to Peter Fleischmann, a professor at Erlangen-Nuremberg, Hitler suffered from an equally rare condition that gifted him with an undescended testicle. Fittingly, this latest report suggests that Hitler paired that lone testicle with a so-called "micropenis."
Hitler, whose Nazi leadership was responsible for the brutal murder of millions of Jews and other victims, somehow became a topic of heavy Twitter discussion in 2015 thanks to a preposterously dumb @NYTMag poll regarding the time travel-assisted assassination of "baby Hitler." Modern neo-Nazis, sadly, have parlayed that attention into additional headlines thanks to some baffling Donald Trump retweets and an ill-advised attempt at campaign imagery.