Shurt Feelings: Vol. XII

"Shurt Feelings" is an ongoing series in which we make fun of the dumbest T-shirts of the week.

Skip Class is a writer living in Seattle. See more of his work here and follow him on Twitter here.

Can you even explain why this was necessary? The market has officially spoken and now every T-shirt going forward MUST have tie-dye, weed, and the American Flag on it or else it won't be allowed in stores.

You got tiger's blood? I hate to break it to you dawgie, but you barely have any human blood. My dude here looks like French Montana on the Guantamo diet. What exactly do you do when you're not modeling terrible Charlie Sheen references from 2 years ago? Are you a stunt double for scarecrows?

The type setting on this one is so bad, but I can't even focus on that right now because the shit makes negative zero sense in the slightest. It's a list of women in gold foil type. Did you hope that this shirt would act as some sort of aphrodisiac to said types of females? Because I think they're just gonna see what I see: a dude in a terrible T-shirt that probably practices deepthroating with his Sonicare toothbrush

Not sure what it says on dude's butt here. Looks like King Midas nutted all over your crap flap. Hey guys, you know what's hard right now? Trying to get other dude's jealous of your tee by drawing attention to your butt.

Speedy never once in his life said this shit. Shame on you. Also "bitches" is not a Spanish word. And do you see how the stroke on that "H" makes the "L" look like a "T"? That's what we in the design business call a los fuck up. Comprende? LOS FUCK UP?

This is a tank top that a butch lesbian wears, cracking her knuckles while waiting in a porta potty line at a Ludacris concert. She got it when she was in "Cali" even though any self respecting resident from that state never uses that term. Anyone that rides a longboard is clearly not a self-respecting person to begin with, so please don't count them.

Guys, we got ourselves a real rebel here. Antawn is not going to follow your rules and he's fully prepared to give you the double bird if you don't like his mint 2pac soft hand T-shirt. I bet under those shades is another set of shades and under those shades a real snarky attitude.

Hormones? Word? I'm guessing you made this because it sort of looks similar to The Ramones font. That's the reason we need to buy this? Because you found a word that is sort of close to how Ramones is spelled? What kind of bullshit logic is that? I don't even think A-Rod would wear this shit.

Okay, this just hurts my entire face. You're trying to parody Sea World with World Star. Now this is most definitely the laziest shit I have ever seen. I could dead ass go to Home Depot right now and get a day laborer and teach him how to use Photoshop and he would come up with a shirt that was 4000% better than this. As if we needed to give terrorists another excuse to try and eviscerate our whole everything.

You guys are just straight up trying to fuck with people now. The fucking Pringles guy as a tee? You seriously took the dude from the Pringles can, removed his face and put your wack lil brand name in there and called it. How long was that work day? 14 seconds? There are sororities that have shirts made for rush week that have graphics that would son this. Congrats on your unanimous election as the mayor of Doingtheleastville.