Yo, you got your boxy coat for the upcoming season? You better. How else are you going to impress people at all those stupid holiday parties your friends insist on throwing despite the fact that no one ever wants to go a party at someone's house ever? I fucking hate house parties, particularly because I'm an adult and house parties are only fun when you aren't allowed to throw them. Now, when someone says, "Hey Jon, X and Y are throwing a party, you going?" all I hear in my head is, "Hey Jon, X and Y are inviting you over to their tiny, shitty house and now you gotta buy a decent bottle of wine for them and mingle with people you have nothing in common with. You're going to be overdressed and one of their moronic friends is gonna be like, 'Hey, why is your shirt so long?' and you're gonna have to fight the urge to scream, 'FUCK YOU, TRENT. FOR SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T CARE ABOUT CLOTHES YOU SURE DO CARE A LOT ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ARE WEARING. WHY DON'T YOU GO TRY TO GET EVERYONE TO PLAY A DRINKING GAME AGAIN, YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT." Oh right, you can buy this boxy coat from Harris Wharf in both a dark camel regular and black boiled wool from Neighbour. I mean, the product literally has "boxy" in its name.
