10 Types of People You Meet at Auto Shows

Most Likely Wearing: Fanny Pack
We're sure that you're a nice person and that you enjoy helping people, but it's not uncommon to feel annoyed if you're repeatedly asked where something is. We doubt you're wearing an auto show shirt, you're not sporting one of those dorky little nametags, and we're willing to bet that you're not just standing around with an open invitation for questions. If you're the one who is lost, just make sure you find an actual employee and ask them.

Most Likely Wearing: Suit or Dress
"Have any questions?" Gah, it's the same question that causes you to cringe whenever you hear it as you're stepping foot in a clothing store and are truly just looking around. Now, the situation might be different, because if you're an adult at a car show, you might legitimately be looking around to learn information on a bunch of different cars all at one time. In that case, these people are your besties and are more than willing to talk your ear off all about the different features of any car, what's new for the brand, and why they personally think it's such a great driving experience (cue personal eperience about how he or she had to avoid a falling tree with the dog and the kid in the car and everybody got out safely).

Most Likely Wearing: Matching baseball tees
Auto shows can be a great learning tool and a perfect way to expose others to a realm that you know and love. That's why you'll see so many little kids partnered up with their mom or dad, walking around "ooooing" and "aahhhhing" at the most recent concept car the Transformers car that Chevy brought to life. The parent really doesn't even have to do any work, if they don't want to. Simply letting them see the cars for themselves can be an excellent introduction. The next thing they know, the kids are getting their permits and begging said parents for that Subaru BRZ dream car in white pearl.

Most Likely Wearing: Suit or Dress
You might not actually meet this guy, but you see them standing in the VIP sections that you're not allowed to enter. He or she is in a suit or dress that costs more than your first three cars combined, and he's probably sipping champagne with one of the owners or designers. When this person says, "I'd like to buy one of these, when do they go on sale," it's not just a fleeting statement of impulse. This person seeks out the appropriate rep at the show and starts working on the deal right there and then.

Most Likely Wearing: Backpack and two more car-branded hand bags
There's a good shot that this person is also the kid in the parent-child combo. Mainly because anything you can give a kid will make him or her happy. Car companies are all about gimmicks at these auto shows, and they want to hand out something that people will either put up on the walls of their garages or bedrooms or that they can keep on their desks as a little trinket. (read: pens, pens, pens)

Most Likely Wearing: Dress
When a man attends his first auto show, he might be caught off guard by a dream coming to reality before his eyes. He sees a gorgeous woman in a form-fitting black dress and heels standing cheerfully in front of the new Jaguar F-Type Coupe and instantly falls in love. Like, Steve Urkel love in all the obsessive, creepy negative ways. Naturally, men being men, think they're all the most smooth and clever guys at the auto show. They give their hair a quick hand combover, they reassure themselves that their V-neck under a blazer with jeans makes them super cool, but sorta sophisticated, and they ask, "so, uhh, do you come with the car?" Responding to the same joke they've heard for the 18th time that day and at every single show they've been to, the model forces a smile, makes some sort of passive statement like, "only special editions" and hopes the guy goes away. He most likely will (only after trying to chitchat for another 10 minutes), only for the next guy to come up and do the same thing.

Most Likely Wearing: Khakis
A lot of cars at auto shows are behind those black ribbony rope type barriers or up on platforms that have tiny clear signs that say "please keep off" for a reason. It's becuase car makers don't want people to touch them, whether that's because it's a one-off that they know might not work properly if you open the door or because they just want you to keep your greasy chicken finger hands off the flakey blue metallic. Either way, you're going to see people who just reach right over and drag their hands along the body, caressing it if you will. They also touch the dumbest parts of cars, like carpet under the glove box on the Ford Fiesta to make sure it's quality fake carpeting.

Most Likely Wearing: Slacks and short sleeve button up
There are always those dudes you can tell are toxic from 30 feet away. They might have a raggedy old ballcap on with a windbreaker that names their Lion's Club chapter, they probably have a crumb or three on their mouth from the coffee cake they ate this morning, and they're never smiling. That's because they hate change, hate new cars, and don't understand what happened to the good old days of poor safety and feeling every pebble in your left ass cheek. This might be the same guy who doesn't even go up to car models anymore, he just stares creepily at them. For a really long time.

Most Likely Wearing: Polo or button up
This is the guy who makes you wonder, "what ever happened to manners?" He shows up to a car debut late, charges through a crowd, smacking people's backs with the three enormous Nikons he has hanging from his shoulders, starts barking, "you, go a little bit left, you're blocking the light" and stands right in front of people just because he "needs the shot." And just when you think he's leaving, he turns around, shoves a bag into your chest while saying, "hold this and be careful, it's expensive" and changes lenses.