Image via Complex Original
Most cars are designed by men, and when men design things, they often end up looking like (the Vendome Column) or functioning like (turkey baster) the favorite appendage. We can understand why too, it's sleek, functional, and apparently attractive to some. Cars are pieces of industrial design that are made for thrusting forward at speed, which does sound quite a bit like the primary purpose of the one eyed trouser snake.
The strange thing is how good a lot of these cars look. We guess the male gender has something going for it after all. These are The 10 Most Phallic Cars Ever Made.
10. The Deltawing
The whole idea behind this car was to make it more pointy and more shaft-like; it worked, and that's why it's here. Those two bulging wheel arches at the base aren't helping either.
9. Dodge Viper GTS
Between the long hood with the slightly bulbous tip and the double bumps on the roof, there's no arguing that the Viper doesn't look like winky and the brain.
8. C3 Corvette
The coke bottle 'vette could have just as easily been called the "swollen swizzle stick 'vette."
7. Any Weismann
Those deep creases between the hood and the fenders really accentuate the long, smooth shape of Weismann's purple-headed nether ferret front end.
6. Jaguar E-Type
Enzo Ferrari called the Jaguar E-Type "the most beautiful car ever made," and while he might have been right, it also looks quite a lot like wedding tackle. In coupe form it even has some sizable balls.
5. Bill Thomas Cheetah
Bill Thomas was working with GM when he was commissioned to create something that would go head-to-head with the Shelby Cobra, and this is the stubby warrior he came up with.
4. Dartz Prombron Black Snake Edition
This particular car doesn't look at all like anybody's dip stick, but it deserves this spot on the list for actually coming with whale penis leather as an interior option.
Also, it's called "Black Snake," and we couldn't pass that up.
3. Bugatti Type 57 Atlantic
This one almost looks intentional, so it's a little weird that it looks so similar to this children's fictional vehicle.
2. Duesenberg SJ Mormon Meteor
The unfortunate color and weird veiny bulge on the shaft made this a no brainer (or is it a 100 percent brainer? Ehh? Ehhh?).
1. Oscar Mayer Weinermobile
Hot dogs, like penises, are meat rods, and the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile is specifically designed to look like a meat rod.
