Image via Complex Original
Everyone knows you can find some great deals on eBay, and that’s no less true on eBay Motors. Although there are some awesome whips just waiting for you to jump in, there are also plenty of horrors to make you seriously ask yourself when you last had a tetanus shot. Our roundup this time runs the gamut from affordable family sedans to classic muscle cars to exotics -- and wannabe exotics. These are The 25 Worst Cars on eBay Right Now.
25. 1920s Dodge 4-Door Touring Car
Location: Sidney, Nebraska
Current Bid: $107.50
Although we're impressed that this body looks this good nearly 100 years after it was made, it's listed under "Cars & Trucks," not "Parts & Accessories." We also can't help but picture the look of sheer and abject crestfallen despair some impressionable child would get upon finding this in the straw in their Easter basket.
24. 1989 Toyota Camry
Location: Orange, California
Current Bid: No current bid; starting bid is $100
Year after year, Toyota Camrys top the lists of most stolen vehicles in the U.S. Luckily for the auction winner, no one's going to steal this one. It runs rough, doesn't drive, and the seller has no knowledge of how it got into this state, because it was a charitable donation. Oh, and the radiator needs replacing, once you figure out what else is preventing it from being drivable. If you like your bland, nondescript cars with a sense of mechanical mystery, bid away.
23. 1960 Dodge 100 Town Wagon
Location: Davenport, Iowa
Current Bid: $510
This is what happens when you let a school bus jump an SUV.
22. 2010 Ferrari California
Location: Rancho Cordova, California
Current Bid: No current bid; Buy It Now price is $91,900
We'd only consider this in the "worst" category because it's genuinely sad that one of these got wrecked, especially in this nice a color. But it's also horrifying in another way: That damage reminds us of the first time we saw the T-800. It's simultaneously cool and terrifying to see the skin ripped away on a beautiful piece of machinery like this, like we're seeing something we shouldn't be. This is the only modern California we've seen that could actually give us nightmares.
21. 1950 Chevrolet 6400
Location: Spartanburg, South Carolina
Current Bid: $200
The seller says not much is known about this car, because it's been there longer than he or she has. The seller also says that pretty much everything is shot on this truck. We're all for a nice restoration, but is there actually anything left under all that rust to restore?
20. 1975 AMC Gremlin
Location: Glendale, California
Current Bid: $2,700
It's an all-original Gremlin, down to the funky '70s mustard yellow paint. Need we say more? We do appreciate how it's posed in this photo; it looks like that yellow fire hydrant is its hood ornament.
19. 1955 Chevrolet Bel Air
Location: Seaman, Ohio
Current Bid: $3,550
As American Flag paint jobs go, this one is more tasteful than tacky; well, as much as that can actually happen. But why would you spend all that time and money on the paint before you restored the interior? Now you (or whoever you sell this car to) have to become a paranoid jerk whenever you take body panels off, because you don't want to ruin the paint. This car needs a ton of work, too. Good going, seller. Good going.
18. 1989 Chrysler TC by Maserati
Location: Walker, Louisiana
Current Bid: No current bid; Buy It Now for $3,950
As long as one of these is listed on eBay, we guarantee it will be one of the worst cars available. This was one of the cruelest automotive jokes ever released on unsuspecting car buyers, and it hasn't gotten any less terrible with time.
17. 2002 BMW 325i
Location: Woodbridge, Virginia
Current Bid: No current bids; starting bid is $2750
The seller wants you to know that only the passenger side door airbag and roof airbag deployed in this accident. So, you know, the car is totally fine. At what point do you just part your wrecked car out instead of trying to sell the whole thing? Replacing airbags, especially side curtain airbags, is a special kind of hell, even for the DIY-inclined. We're not certain, but there might also be specialized rivets involved that you'll have to remove and replace. We hope anyone who buys this really knows what they're getting themselves into.
16. 1968 Cadillac Coupe DeVille
Location: Marshfield, Missouri
Current Bid: $910
If this isn't the saddest classic Caddy you've ever seen, we'd like to know what is.
15. 1967 Pontiac GTO
Location: Merkel, Texas
Current Bid: No current bids; starting bid is $1200
Many muscle car enthusiasts dream of one day owning a nice GTO. This isn't it. But we'd like to add that we'd sooner pay $1200 for this than the $1000 a seller is asking for a salvage-titled Saturn elsewhere on this list. After all, this could actually become something cool in the right hands (and with a boatload of cash thrown into it). The Saturn will still always be a Saturn.
14. 1967 Dodge Dart
Location: Athens, Georgia
Current Bid: $400
Seller says the windshield is cracked and it's missing the interior door panels. Oh, also, it doesn't currently run, but should do so with installation of a new battery and a tune-up. Also, it has minor rust, which we're sure you didn't notice. We're not even sure where to start with this car, but we're pretty sure the seller must have an amazing sense of humor.
13. 1963 Volkswagen Karmann Ghia Convertible
Location: Gilbert, Arizona
Current Bid: $519.89
Loads of rust and a locked-up engine explain why it's priced this low. But it's this photo that haunts us. Looking at it, we can't help but hear the ghost of past Pauly Shore's cinematic atrocities.
12. 2006 Toyota 4Runner Limited
Location: Smithton, Illinois
Current Bid: $4000
"See, brah, the accident damage is totally repairable. The airbag didn't go off. Wanna buy my car now, brah? Please?"
11. 1966 Ford Mustang Convertible
Location: Oswego, New York
Current Bid: $2000
At first glance, this looks like a pretty winter postcard. Then you notice the missing front quarter panel, and you read in the auction that although this car was meant for restoration, it has now sat unattended for so long that the frame is gone and it's only good for parts. There are few things we hate more than wasted potential.
10. 1963 Chevrolet Impala Wagon
Location: Waynesville, Missouri
Current Bid: No current bid; $1800 is the Buy It Now price
Woody wagon with tetanus thrust! Seller says it's in "good shape," but gives no details, other than saying it has some surface rust issues. You think? Does it run? The seller doesn't think it's important enough to tell you.
9. 1972 Chevrolet Vega Panel Express Wagon Pro Street
Location: Willis, Virginia
Current Bid: $1,025
We're not sure if the "Eldelbrock" bits mentioned in the listing are merely an unfortunate typo, or some bootleg off-brand. You know, like Malk (now fortified with Vitamin R). The thing that really kills us, though, is the paint. Flames shouldn't look like feathers, dude.
8. 1951 Ford Other
Location: Albany, Texas
Current Bid: $100
"I am sure there is something I have left out." No, there isn't. It just been eaten by all the rats nesting in the upholstery.
7. 1958 Edsel 4 Door Pacer
Location: Chillicothe, Missouri
Current Bid: $425.00
Our eyes! Our eyes! We looked at all the auction photos, and we're certain there's no angle from which this car looks good. This is one bygone "classic" model that restoration can't fix. And now we need eye surgery to repair the damage.
6. 1983 Toyota SR5 Camper
Location: Chula Vista, California
Current Bid: $1,500
This looks like a slightly more advanced version of the caravans that Clarkson, May, and Hamster built for an infamous Top Gear challenge. We can't help thinking that you'd be screwed in the camper portion if a stiff wind came up.
5. 1987 Pontiac Fiero-based PISA XTC
Location: Reynoldsburg, Ohio
Current Bid: $500
Anyone who actually thinks this will fool people into believing it's a Ferrari deserves what they get.
4. 2009 Ford Escape Hybrid
Location: Marlboro, New York
Current Bid: No current bid; Buy It Now price is $1750
It's a former NYC Taxi Ford Hybrid with no engine and no transmission. The seller describes it as having the insides "dismantled" and states that it is in poor condition. We really can't understand why no one has bid on a winner like this yet.
3. 1984 Replica Johnson Phantom
Location: Lee's Summit, Missouri
Current Bid: $113.61
"Was a 1984 Firebird with clear title." We're sure it was ... before THE FIRE. Yikes.
2. 1999 Saturn SL2
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Current Bid: No current bid; starting bid is $1000
Let's get this straight. Car is a salvage title, burns oil, needs an O2 sensor, has had the sunroof sealed shut with silicone to "fix" a leak, has 2 new tires (not 4, so clearly they're not wearing evenly), and is from the boring and shitty era of Saturn -- prior to their more interesting last-ditch efforts to save the company. Yet, this seller is asking for a starting bid of $1000. Do we even need to remind you that old-school Saturns like this featured body panels made of PLASTIC as a selling point? $1000. Salvage title. Lots of repairs needed. Sure, dude. Sure.
1. 2004 Pontiac Grand Prix
Location: Hollywood, Florida
Current Bid: No current bid; Buy It Now price is $3000
Lambo doors are so played out, we can't even remember the last time they were cool. (Were they ever cool on anything that wasn't an actual Lambo?) And 24-inch rims might look good on an SUV, but on a Grand Prix? We like a sporty ride, but not when it feels like you're jamming a spiked cricket bat against your spine every time you hit a pothole. Also, don't get us started on those tacky stick-on chrome vents. And WTF is up with the side skirts falling off and lying all over the driveway under the car? At least use a little double-sided tape for your sale photos. Ugh.
