Sports

10 '80s Basketball Players We Wish Sarah Palin Had Hooked Up With

Glen Rice. Really? That's the best you could do?

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Intro

So...you have heard about this, right? That Glen Rice is saying he had a one-night stand with Sarah Palin in 1987 when he was playing for the Michigan Wolverines in the Great Alaska Shootout and Palin was a local sports reporter? You heard that right? Leave aside your revulsion at this apparent breach of journalistic ethics, and let that sink in for a minute. Now think about this: What if a different team had come out to the annual basketball tournament in Anchorage. Who might Mama Grizzly have hooked up with? We've got 10 candidates...

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Drexler

Clyde Drexler

Look at footage of this guy, he could not go to his left. It's irrefudiatable: dude drove hard right every time.

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Eaton

Mark Eaton

About as close to a grizzly bear as the NBA has ever seen. Or a sasquatch.

Kareem

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar

If SP had a thing for black dudes in the '80s, why not go whole hog and have a black Muslim dude? Maybe whole hog isn't the right metaphor, but you get the idea. Also, Kareem would have to get his statue if he smashed Palin.

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Green

A.C. Green

According to the Palin bio, the Grizzly-Rice tryst was initiated by SP, when "she hauled his ass down." But could she crack the will of sport's most famous virgin?

Ferry

Danny Ferry & Christian Laettner

White on white on white!

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Chapman

Rex Chapman

The white man for women who like black men (but can't have them).

Jordan

Michael Jordan

In '87, MJ could see Russia from where he was, too. Serendipity!

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Barkley

Charles Barkley

The original black Republican! And remember, NOT a role model.

Bogues

Muggsy Bogues

She's 5'5", he's 5'3". Hey, you don't call it a fetish for nothing.

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Rodman

Dennis Rodman

Crazy, meet crazy. Wait — who would wear the dress in that relationship?

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