Image via Complex Original
I've watched Rocky IV four times this past month and it still hurts. Feb. 20 was the first time that most of the United States watched women's hockey in four years, because that's just what you do when you think a team is going to win. After all, it's not bandwagoning if it's for America. However, America didn't win. They lost by a goalpost. A fucking goalpost. February got off to a rough start with that weak Super Bowl, but things went downhill after that goalpost nonsense happened.
Not only did the U.S. women's hockey team lose, but the men's hockey team started playing weak when it mattered most and ended its tournament without a medal, thanks to a 5-0 blowout at the hands of Finland. United States became the first one to lose—because that's what second place is at the end of the day—to Russia in the medal count. This is the same country that couldn't get it together and held a shoddy Olympics filled with struggles inside and out of the Games.
The bad luck spilled into national sports. The invincible LeBron James broke his nose and...actually a lot of the fails fell on the Knicks. They sucked just like they have all season, but this month they solidified themselves as the innovators of sucking. Too harsh? The buzzer-beater from Dirk Nowitzki set a new standard. Then there's Raymond Felton getting caught with a weapon in one of the worst possible states: the Big Apple.
What kept February from being a total tragedy was John Calipari's amazing facial expression and AT-AT Walkers—you know, from Star Wars—invading Sochi. Here's The Best Sports GIFs of February 2014.
RELATED: The Best Sports GIFs of January 2014
RELATED: The 25 Most Badass Plays of 2013 in GIFs
Take That, Dwight Howard!
Date: 2/19/2014
Sooooooo petty.
Ski Crash Leads to Awesome Photo Finish
Date: 2/20/2014
Only the top two advance, so guess who had his small come-up moment in this sequence?
Butt Check
Date: 2/17/2014
Ever watched a scrawny dude try to dance with a big girl in the club?
Wale's Basketball Skills Could Use Some Work
Date: 2/14/2014
Clearly, basketball isn't really his thing.
LeBron James Is Awesome in Wastepaper Basketball
Date: 2/28/2014
Oh oh...OFF THE HIZZY!
Nike Owes Manu Ginobili an Apology
Date: 2/26/2014
Ginobili's defense was so good that his sneaker awarded him with a house slipper.
Crossing Up Anthony Davis Does Not Happen
Date: 2/10/2014
Uhh...perhaps pass the ball next time.
Ghostriding the Sled
Date: 2/7/2014
Anybody tell him there's no style points in this event?
Nick Young Got a Boo to Check Up On
Date: 2/20/2014
Don't front like you wouldn't be on your phone 24/7 if Iggy Azalea was your girl.
Rob Ford Jumps for Joy
Date: 2/20/2014
The best workout he's had in a minute.
Skier Takes a Tumble at Sochi
Date: 2/18/2014
Yeah, this is pretty bad. But let's look at the bigger picture. The ski crash from ABC's Wide World of Sports opening—the one where the athlete spirals out of control while the announcer is all like "AND THE AGONY OF DEFEAT"—is way worse. (On a side note, ain't that some shit? The skier's legacy is pretty much being the very symbol of sports failure.)
Nelly the Babysitter
Date: 2/15/2014
Here's a little backstory so this doesn't seem completely random.
Rasheed Wallace Goes Crazy Over Dunk
Date: 2/21/2014
Can we promote Rasheed Wallace to head coach at some point? Please?
The Broncos Crap the Bed From the Jump
Date: 2/2/2014
Also known as: One of the Broncos' only Super Bowl highlights.
Mario Balotelli Is a King
Date: 2/14/2014
"Yeah that was an impressive goal..IF YOU WERE A MORTAL."—Balotelli
Louis Nix III Can't Stick a Landing
Date: 2/24/2014
Look at him making a name for himself already!
Carmelo Anthony's Life Is in Shambles
Date: 2/22/2014
"A max contract isn't worth this amount of stress."—Melo
LeBron James and the Double Flop
Date: 2/3/2014
Karma still went a bit overboard with breaking his nose.
Marcus Smart Starts a National Debate
Date: 2/8/2014
Kill the "Marcus Smart wasn't smart" puns. There are two sides to every story.
Kam Chancellor Crushes Demaryius Thomas, Breaks Denver's Will
Date: 2/2/2014
Those who think Chancellor should've won the Super Bowl MVP have a fair argument. The Broncos never truly regained their momentum after this hit.
Paul George and John Wall Bust the Nae Nae
Date: 2/15/2014
We could've went with John Wall's dunk, but that's too obvious. Let's look at what really matters here: John Wall is the first Dunk Contest Winner to bust the Nae Nae after a dunk. #history
LeBron James Gets His Nose Broke
Date: 2/20/2014
"LeBron is down. Is he bleeding? OH SHIT!" If you were watching this in a group, guaranteed someone had some variation of this reaction.
The Epic Jim Boeheim Blow-Up
Date: 2/22/2014
The ref had to eject him. You saw how hard that overhand right was? He would've gotten bodied.
The Knicks Season in One GIF, Presented by Dirk Nowitzki
Date: 2/24/2014
Somebody please save Melo.
Ashley Wagner Tells It Like It Is
Date: 2/9/2014
Yeah, she cursed. But it's OK since the flag makes it patriotic.
Michael Cobbins' Direct Deposit Isn't in His Account
Date: 2/3/2014
And the rent is due. Looks like you're going to be a little short, fam.
Bad Defense Gives John Calipari the Heebie Jeebies
Date: 2/18/2014
Calipari acted like Julius Randle was about to give him cooties.
This Close...
The Empire Strikes Sochi
Date: 2/12/2014
The Empire is always on some bullshit.
