Today in fuckery of the highest order, our dear decaying planet has been burdened with the arrival of the Too Hot to Handle trailer.
As the upcoming series' title may or may not make clear to you, the latest entry in Netflix's growing reality catalog is basically a long-form version of the Seinfeld episode "The Contest," albeit with greater stakes:
On the shores of paradise, gorgeous singles meet and mingle. But there’s a twist. To win a $100,000 grand prize, they’ll have to give up sex.
The rules of this camera-addled dating purgatory are actually quite extensive, with the full series synopsis noting that those hoping for the $100,000 must also refrain from kissing, "heavy petting," and self-gratification. The synopsis also includes the phrase "no-bone zone," which no one wanted to read or hear or otherwise come in contact with on this otherwise pleasantly mundane Friday afternoon.
Too Hot to Handle hits your recently overused Netflix account on April 17. If you're really about this life, perhaps you'll consider a week-long marathon of self-denial of your own in anticipation. Best wishes to you if so.
Anyway, in the spirit of dragging this on for a bit longer because what the fuck else do any of us have to do, enjoying some Too Hot to Handle trailer reactions below comes highly recommended. Do note that a timely People typo resulted in multiple instances of the word "Netlix."
