Ben Affleck Formally Retires Bat Cape: 'I Guess, Uh, I'm Not Batman'

Ben Affleck was surprised with a Batman retirement ceremony on the latest 'Jimmy Kimmel Live.' Sadly, Simon & Garfunkel did not assist.

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Of all the actors who’ve been tasked with playing Batman across cinema history, Ben Affleck was definitely one of them. Now, after a pair of movies and a cameo beneath the BDSM-friendly attire, Affleck has formally retired from his duties as billionaire Chiroptera enthusiast Bruce Wayne.

During an appearance on Thursday's Jimmy Kimmel Live! Affleck was surprised with a touching retirement ceremony. 

"You know, I tried to direct a version, worked with a really good screenwriter, but just kinda couldn't come up with a version, couldn't crack it," Affleck said of ending his tenure. "So I thought it was, like, you know, time to let someone else take a shot at it and they got some really good people so I'm excited."

To properly pass the proverbial bat torch, Kimmel arranged for Affleck's (notably defaced) bat cape to be sent into the rafters of the Hollywood studio. To make room, however, he had to take down Matt Damon's thong from Behind the Candelabra. As Affleck noted, the wardrobe piece still bears a "Damon musk."

Affleck then delivered a moving sendoff message for his Batman years: "I guess, uh, I'm not Batman," he said, presumably while holding back a tidal wave of tears. The only thing that could have made this ceremony even more touching would have been the added surprise of a Simon & Garfunkel reunion performance.

As for who should be behind the mask moving forward, we already let loose a few contenders including Shia LaBeouf, John David Washington, and Christopher Abbott.

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