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Last Spring, the Republican National Committee announced that it would be spending $10 million to bolster its minority outreach efforts. Of course, Republicans have spent far greater resources and time trying to suppress minority voters, but maybe this chump change is to secure at least five and a half of the 12 black voters they want in the voting pool.
In any event, part of their "outreach efforts" include doing events with Traci Braxton (the Braxton sister Toni, Tamar & the other two left behind in "Murrlyn"). As of now, it's the social media shout outs the GOP Twitter account has aimed in the direction of "the Blacks" that's generated the most attention—and not for reasons RNC chairman Reince Priebus would like. In January, @GOP declared racism to be over, and this month, the party that pacifies the racist fringe sect of the country wanted to "honor" Black History Month—including the scant amount of black Republicans. Not surprisingly, people of all colors united to slam the GOP for their sadly ironic tweets.
Here's a look at some of the funniest responses thus far. GOP, I know you're going to dust yourself off and try again, but please take heed to this post. We see through y'all.
Full House of Wu
I actually think that if there was any daughter from the Tanner family that would be Wu-Tang fans, it'd be Michelle. Still, you get it. Now laugh.
Who You Wit?
You are who you hang with, GOP.
Rosa Parks Ain't Your People
Much like this Twitter user, I found the GOP's nod to Rosa Parks peculiar given the various Republican voter ID legislation introduced in states across the country. Let's be real: today they might let Rosa Parks sit in the front of the bus to get to the polling station, but as soon as she arrived she would be told that unless she had a proper ID, a birth certificate, two pints of blood to spare, and a tattoo of white Jesus on her left thigh, she wouldn't be allowed to vote.
What 'Chu Talking About, GOP?
You have to be of a certain age to get this reference (or like me and have older siblings plus the older black people cable stations), but somewhere Gary Coleman is in heaven happy as hell that the tweets are still talking about him. Respect to George and Feminista Jones, who created this hilarious hashtag.
Dangerous Tweets
I have to laugh at this because realistically, I can't reach the computer screen and choke the shit ouf of this clown for this t-shirt.
Don't Even Bother, Dumbo Party
I'm a firm believer in the power of profanity, and sometimes, a simple "shut the fuck up" sufficies. I mean, she could've also quoted Michael Jackson's "They Don't Care About Us," but this is just as good. Truly.
Your One and Only
This month, Republicans have launched YouTube, radio, TV and print ads highlighting black party members in honor of Black History Month. You know, like a cute lil' interlude looped into a 60-minute album.
FYI: Not even @GOPBlackChick—who is best described as "How does the same old race ignorant, conservative shtick sound when gussied up as a black woman?"—is fully on board with the GOP's current outreach plan.
Braxton Values
The hilarity in this tweet has less to do with Republicans and more so is rooted in the notion of watching Braxton Family Values for Traci Braxton. It's not like she gets that much airtime, anyway (maybe that's why she has time to help the GOP). Still, Traci Braxton really wants the attention—and some quick cash to pay her cable bill. I get it, but Traci (a.k.a Left Behind Braxton), there are better ways to make a quick buck and take some pictures. Say, hosting a spades tournament and fish fry at the hole in the wall spot on MLK Boulevard.
We Don't Like Your Black Friends Like That
This is an oldie, but a goodie because it highlights one of the biggest problems the GOP has in reaching black voters. Well, besides actual bad policy, being a home for racists, allowing its elected officials to throw racist attacks against the country's first black president, and treating Michael Steele the same way Peter Gunz treats Amina Buddafly. Okay, you get it, but what the Grand Old Party doesn't get is that a black face alone is not going to make us instantly want to be down. Stacey Dash writing love notes to Mitt Romney won't cut it. The same goes for LL Cool J and his "Accidental Racist" duet that was drenched in corniness and peppered with "Fuck outta here, yo."
It Tastes As Bad As It Looks
As we inch closer and closer to the midterm elections, and not long after, the 2016 presidential race, Republicans are surely going to keep trolling us black folks on Twitter. However, word to the wise: Don't listen to the media when they tell you to reach out to us. That sounds good in theory, but when you have a party full of people who think President Obama was born in a Kenyan socialist hospital and that only Herman Cain-like black folks should be allowed to vote, there's really no point. At present, most of us don't like y'all and vice versa (clearly). When that changes, feel free to try again.
