Image via Complex Original
The blog-style gossip site Media Take Out, which launched in 2006, is notoriously known for inciting celebrity drama. And as the most visited urban website in the world, readers constantly demand slanderous dirt (read: shade) on A-listers. The most fascinating part about the online gabfest, however, is its unique approach to crafting headlines. Never before has a web entity appropriated such a distinct (read: ratchet) style and voice. Here, we recap the best headlines of September.
RELATED: Media Take Out Keeps It Real: Reimagining World Events as Covered by MTO
HOORAY!!! Alicia Keys Got Rid Of That SILLY STAR TREK HAIRSTYLE . . . Now She's Back To Looking CUTE AGAIN!!
Date: Sept. 1
The hair makes the girl.
CONGRATS!!! Remember Child Actress MAIA CAMPBELL . . . Who Became A CRACKHEAD . . . Well She's CLEANED UP . . .. And PREGNANT!!
Date: Sept. 2
Anything is possible. You go, girl.
In Today's Episode Of WHITE FOLKS DO THE DARNDEST . . . Drunk White Girl Blows THE HIGHEST BREATHALYZER SCORE Ever . . . Then Brags About It On Twitter!!
Date: Sept. 2
This is why you shouldn't let your kids go to college out of state.
EXTREME THIRST!!! Actor Shemar Was Trying To BE NICE . . . And Take Pics With FANS . . . When This THIRSTY CHICK COMES ALONG . . .
Date: Sept. 3
She was just husband hunting.
Lamar Odom's DRUG DEALER SPEAKS . . . Claims Khloe's Husband Was HIGH ON CRACK . . . When He Played The NY KNICKS!!!
Date: Sept. 3
Who won that game?
BIG PIMPIN!!! LeBron James MAMA Is Dating A Miami Rapper . . . And Dude Is LIVING THA LIFE . . . While Bron Bron Is PAYING DUDE BILLS!!!
Date: Sept. 3
This is called finding a sugar son.
SHOCK REPORT: African Millionaire Is KILLED By His FIVE WIVES . . . They F**KED HIM TO DEATH!!!!
Date: Sept. 4
Not a bad way to go, right?
Robin Thicke And Paula Patton ARE CONFIRMED SWINGERS . . . Paula Asked The BLONDE GIRL . . . To F**K HER HUSBAND!!!
Date: Sept. 4
Robin Thicke is one lucky guy.
Welp . . . Guess We Now Know What Gabby 'PRECIOUS' Sidibe Did All SUMMER . . . She SAT IN THE SUN AND ATE PORK PRODUCTS!!!
Date: Sept. 5
That's just not healthy.
AWWW SH*T . . IT'S GOING DOWN!! Kim Kardashian BLASTS Kanye West . . . Says She's NOT ATTRACTED To Him . . . And That His D**K SMELLS!!!
Date: Sept. 5
We all saw this coming.
LMAOOOOOO!!! These Folks On Twitter Are RUTHLESS . . . They F**KING With Them Pics Of Jay Z Diving Into The POOL!!!
Date: Sept. 6
The Internet takes photoshop to a whole new level.
SHE DID IT AGAIN!!! Celebrity Socialite Teyana Taylor EXPOSED HER BREASTS AGAIN . . . Too Bad Her BULLDOG FACE Was In The Picture!!!
Date: Sept. 6
Third time's the charm.
Frank Ocean Needs To GO SIT DOWN SOMEWHERE . . . Cause Obviously He's STILL BUTT HURT That Chris Brown BEAT HIS AZZ!!!
Date: Sept. 7
Poor guy.
WOOOOOOOOW!! These New BOOTY DOCTORS Are Amazing . . . With Modern Medicine . . . They Can TRANSFORM PRECIOUS Into MALIAH . . . In One Operation!!!
Date: Sept. 7
Modern medicine really is amazing.
Beyonce's FIRST BOYFRIEND Is Talking . . . All About Their SEX LIFE . . . Find Out If JIgga Was THE FIRST ONE In Bey's BOX!!!
Date: Sept. 8
The million dollar question.
OOOOOH SNAP!!! Kanye West Goes On A DOUBLE DATE . . . Yeezy got His BLONDE DUDE . . . And His Homie Is Out With FRANK OCEANS EX!!!
Date: Sept. 9
Is anyone really shocked by this?
WHOOPS!!! Kim Kardashian 'ACCIDENTALLY' Tweets Out A Pic Of The New IPHONE 6 . . . Before Apple Announces It!!!
Date: Sept. 10
Celebrities really do have the upper hand.
We Got CLOSE UP PICS Of Rihanna's New MULLET WEAVE . . . And While We Think It Looks STUPID . . . Her Hairstylist Did A GOOD JOB With The Weave!!
Date: Sept. 10
It's not that bad.
Did Y'all Just Feel THAT RUMBLE IN THE GROUND .. . No That Wasn't An EARTHQUAKE . . . That's The Sound Of DEELISHIS TWERKING!!!
Date: Sept. 11
Twerking like a champion.
New CLOSE UP Pics Of Beyonce's Face Suggest . . . That She Might Be A LOT OLDER THAN 32 Years Old!!
Date: Sept. 11
Even if it's true, she still looks amazing.
Rapper Gucci Man Releases Some TEXT MESSAGES . . . That Were SUPPOSEDLY Sent To Him From RAPPER DRAKE!!!
Date: Sept. 12
It may be possible that Drake is softer than we all thought.
Chris Brown's CONCUBINE KOOCHI KOOCHI Changes Up Her Look . . . Now She Has FIRE RED HAIR . . . Just Like RIHANNA USED TO HAVE!!!
Date: Sept. 13
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
MTO SUPER WORLD EXCLUSIVE: Mariah Carey And Nas Looked 'VERY COZY' At His Birthday Party . . . Does This Mean That Mariah And Nick Are SPLITTING UP???
Date: Sept. 14
Mariah's Wild N' Out.
WHOOPS!! Justin Bieber's EX-GIRLFRIEND Selena Gomez Has A 'WARDROBE MALFUNCTION' On Stage . . . She BUSSED IT A Little Too Open . . . And Showed HER GOODIES!!
Date: Sept. 15
When you're ready come and get it ...
Floyd Mayweather Brought ALL SIX OF HIS GIRLFRIENDS To The Fight Last Night . . . They All Got CUSTOM MADE GOWNS . . . So You Decide . . . Who Looked THE BEST!!
Date: Sept. 15
Player card approved.
MTO WORLD EXCLUSIVE: Party Crasher . . . Latina GROUPIE Had To Be 'PHYSICALLY REMOVED' From LeBron James' Wedding!!!
Date: Sept. 16
The groupies are real.
WHAT THE F**K????? Jada Pinkett Shows Off her NEW HAIR STYLE . . . And It Looks Like She Let WILLOW CUT HER HAIR!!!
Date: Sept. 17
Like mother, like daughter.
LMAOOOOOOOOOO!!! Kim Kardashian's Mother ACCIDENTALLY SLIPS UP On Instagram . . . Exposes That Her Show Keeping Up With The Kardashians . . . Is A COMPLETE FRAUD!!!
Date: Sept. 18
Tell us something we didn't know.
Remember That SEXY BEARD That Chris Brown Had . . . The One We Showed Y'all Yesterday . . . Well He DREW IT ON With A Magic Marker!!!
Date: Sept. 19
Anything to look good.
YIKES!!! Remember How We Always Used To Say That Actress STACEY DASH . . . NEVER AGES . . . Welp . . . She's AGING FAST NOW!!!
Date: Sept. 20
Had to happen sometime.
OH WOW!!! You Know AMBER RILEY . . . The Black Girl From GLEE That's Gonna Be On Dancing With The Stars . . . Well They Caught Her On A BAD DAY!!!
Date: Sept. 21
Not a good look.
Gabby Union Loses Her BIKINI BOTTOMS While Running On The Beach . . . EXPOSES HER COOCH To The Camera!!
Date: Sept. 22
At least she's exercising.
Atlanta Rapper ALLEY BOY'S Ex Girlfriend Puts Him ON BLAST . . . Releases ALL His Thirsty Text Messages . . . So He RESPONDS . . . And Releases NEKKID PICS OF HER!!!
Date: Sept. 23
If this is true, his new album makes sense now.
White Rapper Iggy Azaelia Is DOING THE MOST At A Concert . . . She's Not Even DANCING . . . She's Just SPREADING HER LEGS . . . And Showing The Crowd Her UTERUS!!!
Date: Sept. 24
That's a view only a doctor should see.
YIKES!! Karrueche Must Smoke A WHOLE LOTTA WEED . . . Cause Look At WHAT IT DID To Her Lips!!!
Date: Sept. 25
Another reason to stay off of drugs, kids ... lip burns.
Reality Star Antoine Dobson Is Photo'd Out With A Woman . . . We Can't Tell If That's His BABYS MOTHER . . . Or His SHOE SHOPPING PARTNER!!!
Date: Sept. 26
We're going to go with shoe shopping.
You Are Not Gonna BELIEVE Who They Say Drake Is Dating Now . . . If It's True . . . Somebody Needs To SMACK THE SH*T OUTTA HIM!!!
Date: Sept. 27
This is fake ... right? Please let this be fake.
AWWWWW SH*T!!! Online Rumors Claim That Miley Cyrus . . . Is PREGNANT With Rapper JUICY J'S BABY!!!!
Date: Sept. 30
That's what happens when you twerk too much.
Rapper Diddy Told His Girlfriends KIM PORTER And CASSIE . . . To Take The WEEKEND OFF . . . While He Spent QUALITY TIME WITH BABY MAMA NUMBER THREE!!!
Date: Sept. 30
Like a boss.
EXTREME THIRST!!! They Saying That MARRIED R&B Singer Keyshia Cole Was At The CLUB LAST NIGHT . . . THROWING THE P*ZZY AT Ex-Boyfriend Young Jeezy!!!
Date: Sept. 30
Not cool, Keyshia.
