2016 will "catch these hands" if it brings its distinct brand of shittiness anywhere near Betty White. That's the promise of a new crowdfunding effort launched by Demetrios Hrysikos following the death of Carrie Fisher, as spotted by Cosmopolitan Wednesday. White, 94, hasn't publicly commented on the GoFundMe account which has already exceeded its initial goal of $2,000 in just one day.

"If she's okay with it I will fly to wherever Betty White is and keep her safe [until] Jan. 1 , 2017," Hrysikos explained. "Now, assuming she doesn't want a strange Greek standing [guard] outside her door, all monies will be donated to the Spartanburg Little Theatre to help craft new stars of stage and screen to carry [the] mantle of the legends that have left [us] this year."

Though we can't vouch for the authenticity of the GoFundMe's final donation promises, Hrysikos added a few more details in the latest update. "Other than liking to support our local arts and having a friend who works at the little theater I don't have any connection to it, I just thought it would be a good place for any money made to go," he said Tuesday night. "2016 has taken so many great artists and SLT helps support and nurture new budding talent in our town. I'd like to think that Betty, Carrie, and Bowie would be happy with any proceeds going to that cause, which I assure you it WILL."

Dude is clearly riding a momentous wave of support, as evidenced by these tweets below that you could surely find on your own but that I've generously included here anyway:

PROTECT BETTY WHITE.