20 Social Media Signs Your Girl Is Going to Leave You

"I should have seen it coming." This is the first thing you tell yourself every time you break-up. Okay, the first thing you tell yourself is, "Do you think we can still have sex?" followed by, "When can I get my blu-rays back?" But after these questions, this is the first thing you tell yourself. Though we can't take the pain of breaking up away (we're pretty sure that duty is historically reserved for Al Green), we can help you see it coming so that you aren't blindsided by a broken heart yet again. Just as the Internet has become the main flirtation destination and the place to score dates, it is also where you can find omens of a relationship headed towards a dead end. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and even Yelp can provide clues that things just aren't going to work out. Light some candles, put on some Motown ballads, lock the doors, and start downloading Waiting to Exhale on iTunes because it's time to come to terms with these 20 Social Media Signs Your Girl Is Going to Leave You.

Like sharks circling in the water, dudes can sense when a woman is about to go back on the market. Don't ask us exactly how we know, but there will be a cadre of men who feel their thirst-sense tingle even before your girl knows it's over. Even innocuous photos of your girl out with her friends or bored at work will start to accumulate attention and the numbers will continue to creep up. Don't try to fight it. If you mention it to her, you'll seem like a jealous jerk. If you confront one of the gentlemen angling for your girl's digital affections, you'll seem like a paranoid lunatic. All you can do when the "likes" start piling in is take a step back and hope that this is just a phase and that things will return to normal.

We have no clue why some women keep Pinterest boards of their dream wedding when they are still realistically half a decade away from getting hitched. Even women who are otherwise progressive, rational individuals spend hours of their week pinning designer napkins and opulent ice sculptures to their wedding dream board. If your girl is one of the many pinners who can't stop debating whether to add a photo of something borrowed or something blue to her digital scrapbook, and, all of a sudden, she ceases her nuptial social networking, you should be concerned. It's possible that you've been such a shitty boyfriend that you've put her off of that dream wedding dress shopping tip. If that Pinterest page goes several weeks sans update, it is time to check in and see what you can do to get her fake marriage to an imaginary person back on track.

Hopefully, even the most intense foodie would have the good sense to lay low on posting Yelp reviews if she's dating around. So, no, we're not saying that she's sharing romantic meals with other men. Even if she is hitting up restaurant after restaurant with her sister, her best friend, or her co-workers, one thing remains true, she isn't going there with you. If you start to sense that your girl will do anything to avoid dining with you, it is time to have a chat about her newfound turn as an amateur food critic. There is nothing wrong with getting a little space from each other, and we all love going out with our boys from time to time, but if you start to see the star ratings pile up, and you haven't been out with her in a month, we give this situation four out of five red flags.

We all know that "liking" a Facebook photo is just a way of checking in and letting that person know you still find them attractive. Sure, if the picture is of a major life milestone or a humorous drunken moment, the photo may earn "likes" from more than the thirsty, but 90% of the time, the thirst reigns supreme. If your girl is suddenly digging into beach albums and photos from pick-up soccer games played in the rain to "like" some dude's six-pack pic, you know you're slipping. You'd better either hit the gym or start paying more attention because the thing about people browsing a menu is that they only tend to look so long before they order a new dish.

Facebook messages exist for two reasons. One of them is to make plans with a group of people who don't know each other well enough to have everyone's number and email. That takes up roughly, ohh, 20% of our inbox. The rest of the Facebook inbox is pure flirtation. Oh, you liked my Facebook status? Message. Oh, you just put up a hot new profile pic? Message. I'm drunk at 3 in the morning in front of my computer and we once made out during "7 Minutes in Heaven" in eighth grade? Message. If you see over your lady's shoulder and that red box contains ever growing numbers of unread messages, it almost definitely means that she is testing the waters. That's right: she's already looking for the next guy to get jealous of how many guys are sending her messages. You've got the message.

When you're girl goes to the beach, especially if she is accompanied by her girlfriends, there will be bikini photos. Girl didn't spend her entire summer alternating from pilates to hot yoga just to show off that body in the confines of the bedroom. This means it is time for her and the girls to walk out just so far in the water and snap photos of themselves casually hugging each other, stretching, and lounging in the low tide. This is totally normal female behavior. That being said, if your girl and her girls have created a meticulously planned amateur Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue for their social network, then there might be some cause for concern. Do your best to supress the thoughts of all of her male friends ogling the photos and passing them around (as you would do in the same situation, admit it) and just focus on being a better boyfriend when she gets back from her on-location shoot.

From one Internet list maker to another, we have to give credit where credit's due. Buzzfeed is about as common a sight on Facebook these days as duckface selfies and self-righteous political posturing. You should pay attention to the lists that your girl is sharing, as they serve as a litmus test for her subconscious. Has she transitioned from sharing lists with titles like "47 Polar Bears Who Think They Work in the Service Industry" and "82 Reasons the Disney Princesses Would Have Made the Best High School Teachers for 90s Sitcom Stars" to posting listicles about love, loss, and regret? It is only a matter of time before you make it onto her user submitted list of "1 Ex-Boyfriend Who Should Have Seen This Shit Coming A Mile Away."

It is a tricky thing, trying to divine your girl's feelings from the music she's listening to. Beyoncé can be a sign that your girl is feeling empowered or heartbroken, depending on the track. An afternoon of Taylor Swift might mean taht she's in the mood for some boyhating or it might mean that she is in the mood for a little banjo with her cookie-cutter pop music. If your girl is knee-deep in some Adele, however, that should serve as a warning salvo. After the two of you split, there will be much much more Adele to come, my friend; view this as a mere prelude. Monitor that Spotify account closely. A few days of Adele might be a clue that she is looking to get rid of you and spend the next month looking to help the British songstress go platinum for the 47th time.

If your lady is a longtime fan of films starring the likes of Matthew McConaughey, Gerard Butler, or the pre-WWE Freddie Prinze Jr, then we've got no beef with her. However, if her cinema diet has been all action and horror films and suddenly she develops a taste for romcoms, you could be in trouble. Normally, full-on romcom mode doesn't rear it's ugly head until post-breakup, accompanied by the obligatory Ben & Jerry's and Kleenex, but if you start to see some schmaltz sneaking into her Netflix queue, sailor take warning. If you're girl is watching romcoms and you aren't invited, she is basically cheating on you with a young Tom Hanks. Because, damn it, if you don't have what it takes to make her Sleepless in Seattle, someone else will.

There are many reasons that your girl might take a sudden interest in feminism. A women's studies course, a move to a more progressive city, or an incident that makes her keenly aware that our society is still a patriarchy could spark an interest in women's lib. You know what else is known to get ladies interested in feminist blogs? If you answered, "having a douche for a boyfriend," you would be correct. If you are being an insenstive prick, oftentimes, a more progressive friend of your girlfriend's might point out, "Hey, your boyfriend is an insenstive prick," and suggest some literature to help her girl self-actualize. If this is your girl's first foray into feminist thought, odds are that a better-read friend won't start them off with a heavy dose of Simone de Beauviour or Naomi Wolfe, but she may send her to some thoughtful lady-friendly blogs. While this feminist awakening will be a good thing for your girl, it might be a bad thing for your relationsihp, if the relationship has involved backwards gender roles and poor communication up to this point.

Selfies are our way of checking in with the world and asking it if it still finds us attractive. While men are generally far more subtle about tossing up a selfie, as we'll often put on a funny hat or make a weird, yet not wholly unattractive face, we all do it. If your girl has been taking to posing in front of the bathroom mirror or throwing up charming fake gang signs while wearing cocktail dresses, this is a red flag. Every woman is entitled to one selfie every time she goes out on the town, one selfie for every two months of maintaining her diet/workout regemin, and one selfie every time she goes to the beach, but if she goes beyond these numbers, she is testing the waters. Don't be deluded: these pics are not for you. You see in-person selfies of her pretty much every day. These photos are to let everybody else know that she's got it, and "it" isn't being appreciated on the homestead.

Getting jealous of new Facebook friends is probably the most ridiculous thing a man can do. Friends can be added as a result of office parties, chance encounters on public transit, or Alcoholics Anonymous; it's not a big deal. If the friends being added are overwhelmingly male, then it might be time to ask yourself if your lady isn't consciously putting herself in a position to add new gentlemen to the digital rolodex. We aren't suggesting that you're girl's cheating. You'll likely know if she is. We're just saying that if one day she isn't meeting any new people and the next she is friending all the dudes on her new co-ed recreational volleyball team, then she may be seeking out some fresh male companionship.

Isn't it totally annoying when couples constantly comment on each other statuses with supportive and loving words? Yes, it is, when other people do it. When you girl stops giving you the unconditional Facebook support that you crave, that's a sign things are getting rocky. It is an unwritten rule that a signficant other must comment or "like" basically every status that their partner puts on the Internet. If your lover breaks this rule, it can only mean one of two things: her Internet is down or your relationship just doesn't have the sickeningly sweet passion that it used to. It could also mean that she didn't think this particular status was that clever, but, we prefer radical overreaction to the rational approach.

The only thing worse than your girl making vague statements and then refusing to talk about it is if she makes vague statements on the Internet and refuses to talk about it. Not only do you have to deal with the emotionally challenging waters of a woman scorned who doesn't want to let you know how you've scorned her, but you also have to deal with your lady's displeasure on a public forum. If you see something like this pop up online, whatever you do, do not engage. We repeat: do not engage with the enigmatic online comment. Treat it like an unexploded landmine. Next time you see her, ask her about it, but not directly. By no means should you say, "Hey baby, I saw what you posted on Facebook this morning." The best you'll get out of that is a "Oh that was nothing." All you can do is say something like, "Is everything okay?," and hope that she feels like talking about it, or that it will all blow over.

We challenge you to find two more embarassing words in the language of the Internet. Being branded with "It's Complicated" is in many ways worse than simply being forced to put that relationship status back to "single." Let's be honest here, if you're girl puts the "It's Complicated" tag on your relationship, she is basically telling the world that you're still providing the emotional support she wants, but she has started to sleep with anyone she'd like. If you find yourself in this situation, and you've stayed in the relationship despite the relentless mockery of your friends, heed our words: get out now. When "It" becomes "Complicated," the best thing to do is uncomplicate things and bolt for the door as fast as you can.

Next to the cemeronial changing of the Facebook status, this is about the surest sign that things are coming to an end. She might say something like, "I just got tired of that picture," or "I hate the way I look in the photo," but you both know the truth: it's over. This is why we whole-heartedly endorse never sharing space in your profile picture. Whether it is a girlfriend, your buddies, or even a pet, no relationship is permanent enough to make it into your profile pic. Putting your significant other in your profile pic is like getting a tattoo. Sure, you can remove it later, but the pain it will eventually cause isn't worth the rush you get when you first put it there.