No Simpin' Allowed: Ab-Soul's Valentine's Day Advice

TDE's secret weapon, appears loc’d out & smoked out when rapping alongside his Black Hippy cohorts, but he’s a romantic at heart. Thats why we recruited Ab-Soul

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Complex Original

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TDE's secret weapon, Ab-Soul, appears loc’d out and smoked out when rapping alongside his Black Hippy cohorts, but he’s a romantic at heart. that’s why we recruited the Carson, Calif., native to help you score points on Valentine’s Day without being a simp.

Interview by Insanul Ahmed (@Incilin)

What should you do on Valentine’s Day for a woman you just started dating?
Because it’s new, that’s the perfect time to get to know each other. Ask her, “What type of things do you like to do on Valentine’s Day? What are the coolest things you’ve done?” Things like that open discussion. Then look into her eyes during your first Valentine’s, and go from there.

Where should you take your date?
All my Valentine’s Days so far, I haven’t had enough money to do extravagant things, so maybe that’s part of my DNA now. With me being a rapper, it might even be clichéd for me to do extravagant things. Me and my girl Alori Joh—she just passed, rest in peace—we understood everybody would be going out to the expensive restaurants, making reservations months ahead for Valentine’s Day. So every year we went to IHOP or El Paso Cantina, this cool little low-key Mexican spot in our area. We were always seated immediately and got a nice booth by ourselves. It was very intimate. Everybody wants to do the most extravagant thing, but we just wanted to be there by ourselves.

Are flowers and chocolates lame gifts?
I came through with the flowers before. That’s not something to stay away from, but it’s not something that I’m into. If you’re dealing with the type of lady who likes those things, you definitely want to provide that. Edible Arrangements, girls like shit like that. You gotta get it delivered like a telegram at her job. You gotta be creative. Girls are creative thinkers. You can’t just give her CDs as a Valentine’s Day gift, that’s weak. I worked at my family’s record store, so that was a Tuesday gift, like, “This that new Beyoncé. It ain’t hit the streets yet. You the first one with it, girl.” When I was in high school, I recorded a song for my girl. She’s the only one that has it. She’s somewhere in a better place; she’ll share it wherever she’s at.

When do you cross the line and look like a simp?
There ain’t really any way to detect that. You just gotta know who you’re dealing with. You gotta know your girl, how extravagant she wants to take shit. Talk to her homegirls about it. If she’s that type of girl reading wedding-gown magazines, then you might have to pull out all of the stops. If your girl be chillin’ with you smoking weed, she might not need that much. You should be able to look at your girl and tell if you’re doing too much. You just gotta pay attention. Us males, most of us have an issue with that. I grew up around all ladies—my mom, my grandma, my auntie, and my little sister—so I get how women want to be treated.

How can you salvage things if you forget about Valentine’s Day?
A dude like me, I’d hit her with the truth, like, “Yo, it’s the 13th and I forgot about tomorrow. You got any ideas?” Honesty is the best policy. But it’s kinda hard to forget about Valentine’s Day—the shit is everywhere.

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