Pop-Tarts, the preferred breakfast of Toaster Strudel detractors, didn't mince words this week when hit with a truly troubling collab proposal from a renowned maker of ranch dressing.
Indeed, Hidden Valley used a quoted tweet opportunity to directly inquire about a ranch-infused Pop-Tart, i.e. an objectively hellacious would-be creation. The quoted tweet, in which both providers of comforting nourishment were tagged, even included some concept art for Frosted Ranch Dressing-flavored tarts of the pop variety that may be familiar to anyone following the @poptartaday parody account on Instagram.
From there, the discourse escalated to near-uncomfortable levels of bluntness. In addition to hitting Hidden Valley with a firm "lol no," whoever runs @PopTartsUS urged a subsequent ranch devotee to wipe their online presence:
And then came the usual corporate pile-on, Little Debbie included, and continued tweeted commentary from those concerned with real issues like ranch, Pop-Tarts, and parody Instagram accounts that give rise to the imagined combination of both. Instead of finding this on your own via Twitter, we've done you and this writer's word count requirement the favor of embedding some of that below.
In the unlikely event that this combo sounds like a winner to you or someone you know, experts say it's theoretically possible to simply dip a single Pop-Tart of any flavor into a container of ranch, thus simulating this experience that will thankfully never actually come to officially pass.
